Page 113 of Xavier

I stagger a step back. Is that really what she thinks? Is she right?

“No. Sweetheart, you’re wrong.”

She sighs, “I’m right, Xavier. And you know it. You’re here because of some fucked up vendetta you have against your own ego. Because of some pent-up feelings of inadequacy, about not being able to protect me.”

“He wouldn’t have done it if I’d been here, Malynda.”

“Maybe, maybe not. We’ll never know, Xavier. What we do know, is that… you’re not much fucking better.”

“What?”

“I saw you. I saw you, Xavier. You were out of control! If I hadn’t stopped you… you, you were probably going to kill him. And that scares me more than anything any stranger could do to me. I don’t even know who you are. I don’t know who you’ve become. I might’ve changed my name, but you changed who you are.”

Her eyes lift to mine, and they’re wet but I can see my reflection in them. And worse, I can see how she sees me. A violent monster. Worse than her actual attacker. A stranger.

“Oh, Malynda…”

“I’ve gotta go. I… I can’t be here. I have to go.”

Her front teeth dig into her bottom lip, stopping it from trembling, and she holds my look for one more second before she turns and walks away.

I want to run after her.

I want to tell her, she’s wrong. It was for her, everything, it was always for her.

I want to tell her I’m the same Xavier she knew and loved back then.

But my feet won’t move. My lungs can barely drag in air.

Maybe it was all for nothing. The moment she left on that bus to come to New York, it ended then, and I’ve been chasing a dream ever since.

“Xave?” I hear Kaine’s voice say, low and quiet.

“She’s gone. She left.”

“Go.” I hear him say quietly, and I feel Ram push past me and then out the door.

“Ram will take care of her, don’t worry,” he says, and I feel his hand, warm but firm on my shoulder.

“She’s gone,” I say again.

“I know. Come on. We need to get out of here.” His hand squeezes.

I turn, looking back up the staircase. “I need to…”

“No, that’s done.”

“I’m not done, Kaine. He’s still…”

He cuts me off. “It’s done. You heard him, he won’t be bothering her again.”

“But he…”

“I know. She told me.”

“Everything?” I search his eyes.

“Yes.”