Page 77 of When In Doubt

“Okay,” I whisper, sad that the moment’s over.

“Take care of my boy.”

“I will.”

With one last press of his lips to my temple, Oscar turns and heads outside, closing the door securely behind him. I stand in the sudden silence, trying to catch my breath. He was here all of ten minutes, but it feels like he’s tipped me off-axis.

Wandering over to the box, I look down at Harvey, feeling a thread of hesitation as I try to work out what to do with him. I crouch down, breathing in the woody scent of the sawdust. “I really hope you like me, buddy. Because I’m kind of crazy about your dad.”

It still scares me, thinking about how much I like Oscar. I’m not used to letting people in, but I kind of get the sense that maybe he isn’t either. It’s not that I don’t trust him, the problem is that I don’t trust myself. My own judgment has steered me so wrong in the past that it’s hard to believe I could take a risk like that again. But even though I’m scared, Oscar makes me want to be brave.

The clanging of heavy footsteps snaps me out of my thoughts as they approach my front door. They sound hurried, like someone running up the metal stairs. There’s a pause before three soft knocks sound out. I open the door to a wide-eyed Oscar. Looking past him, I see his car askew in the lot, door open as if he got halfway through pulling out before he stopped and ran back here.

Before I can say anything, he’s stepping close, one hand sliding past my hair to cup the back of my neck and the other feathering against my cheek. Our chests meet as he draws me close, his toes edging over the threshold.

“We kinda screwed that up, didn’t we?” he growls out. His nose bumps against mine, a soft question. I close the distance a fraction, it’s a tiny movement, but he doesn’t miss it. His lips are on mine, warm and firm, but not insistent. The contact sends sparks down my back, like a static shock.

He’s kissing me.

Holy shit.

I’m letting him kiss me and it’s everything I’ve not been brave enough to want.

I can practically feel my heart slowing down, any panic bleeding out of me until it’s a reassuring thump in my chest. His tongue strokes against my bottom lip until I open for him, and I slip my fingers through his soft strands.

I can feel his eyelashes against my face as we move together. It’s slightly out of sync, a little unpracticed, but something about it feels like sitting in front of a fire in a snowstorm, like it’s the place I was always supposed to be.

What begins with a kind of desperation becomes slow and languid, soft pecks against my lips and the corners of my mouth. When we finally come up for air, it’s with a final lingering kiss that has my toes curling against the carpet. Oscar pulls back and his hands fall slack at his sides, a dazed look on his face.

“Should have done that earlier,” he says with a sly smile. I can’t come up with a single word in reply, so I just nod, dumbstruck. “I’ll see you soon.”

With a quick squeeze of the hand I have pressed against my mouth, he’s gone.

Chapter Twenty-Five

FREYA

“You seriously need to hold still, or else I’m never gonna get an accurate measurement,” I huff. Harvey blinks up at me as I try to hold the tape measure around his little rabbit-belly. He squirms, giving me a nose-twitch, and then jumping off the couch. “Hey!” I call after him as he disappears back into his hutch. “Harvey! You’re going to look so cute! Stop fighting me on this!”

He sticks his head out and I could swear that he’s scowling at me right now. I frown, dropping the tape measure next to the yarn I have laid out. I’ll get him eventually. That rabbit is too cute to leave my apartment without a tiny sweater.

I grab my phone, a flutter of anticipation waking as I check to see if Oscar’s messaged me, the same way it has for the last three days. There’s been nothing from him yet, but I’ve been watching the news for word about the fire and it seems like they have things mostly under control.

The apartment feels too quiet. I need to do something that’s not sitting here worrying about him. My fingers take me to Elsie’s contact without much thought. I haven’t spoken to her since Oscar took me to her house. She’s gonna freak out when I tell her everything that’s happened since then.

She answers after one ring. “Little Peach!”

“Hey, Els, is now a good time?”

“It’s always a good time for you. You doing alright?”

Isn’t that the question. I feel like I’ve been turned upside down and now I don’t know which way is forward.

“I’m okay.” I sigh. “Just a lot going on.”

“This wouldn’t happen to be about that strapping young man of yours, would it?” How does she always know?

“He’s not my man,” I splutter out.