Page 21 of Rich Little Liars

They’d been talking for five hours without me. Without noticing I was gone or thinking to check if I was all right or wondering if maybe it was time for their guest to leave.

I went back to bed and lay awake until I heard the front door close, then Daniel’s footsteps on the stairs. He came into the bedroom moving quietly, clearly thinking I was asleep.

‘I’m awake,’ I said.

He startled, though only a little. ‘Sorry. Didn’t mean to wake you.’

‘What were you talking about? You and Roxanne.’

‘Just stuff. Work, mostly. She’s thinking about retraining, maybe going back to college.’ He got into bed, still talking. ‘She’s smart, you know. Really smart. Just hasn’t had the opportunities we’ve had.’

‘It’s midnight.’

‘Oh?’ He checked his phone, genuinely surprised.

‘Lose track of time, did you?’

‘Come on, Kelly. She’s just good company. Easy to talk to.’

Easier than me, apparently. But I didn’t say that either. I just rolled over and listened to him fall asleep within minutes while I lay there thinking about my friend who’d stopped being just my friend.

The following Tuesday – our usual coffee afternoon – I suggested we go to the café like we used to. Just the two of us, away from the house.

‘Oh.’ Roxanne’s face fell. ‘Actually, I was going to ask if I could come earlier today. I wanted to try that new recipe for chicken, and I thought I could have it ready when Daniel gets home. Surprise him.’

‘Surprise him?’

‘Well, both of you. But I know he’s been stressed with work, and I thought something nice for dinner might cheer him up.’

She knew he was stressed. She knew things about my husband’s state of mind that I should have known but somehow didn’t. When had they talked about his stress? During one of those long evenings? During conversations I wasn’t part of?

‘That’s thoughtful,’ I heard myself say. ‘But maybe just coffee today? Like normal?’

‘We can have coffee here while I cook. That way we’re not rushing.’

She had already decided. My suggestion hadn’t been a suggestion at all – just a speed bump she’d smoothly navigated around.

So we had coffee in my kitchen while she chopped vegetables and seasoned chicken, moving around the space with increased confidence. She knew where everything was now. Didn’t need to ask. Just opened drawers and cupboards like they were hers, and I sat at my own table feeling like I was in the way.

‘You know what you should do?’ she said, sliding the dish into the oven. ‘Go have a bath. Relax. I’ll finish up here and keep an eye on dinner.’

‘I’m fine.’

‘Kelly.’ She sat across from me, reaching for my hand. ‘You look exhausted. When’s the last time you did something just for you? Let me handle this. It’s what friends do.’

Her eyes were so earnest. Her grip on my hand so warm and genuine. She meant well. Of course she did. I was being paranoid, possessive, ridiculous.

So I went upstairs and ran a bath I didn’t want, lowering myself into water that was too hot, and listened to Roxanne humming in my kitchen. Heard the front door open, Daniel’s voice calling hello. Heard Roxanne’s bright reply, her explanation about dinner, his pleased surprise.

I stayed in the bath until the water went cold, putting off the moment when I’d have to go back downstairs and sit at my own table eating food someone else had cooked in my kitchen for my husband. When I finally emerged, they were already eating. They’d waited, Daniel insisted – only just started, I hadn’t missed anything. But their plates were half-empty, and they’d clearly been talking for a while, some conversation I was interrupting by arriving.

How dare I, right?

‘This is amazing,’ Daniel said. ‘Roxanne, seriously. You need to open a restaurant.’

She laughed – that bright, easy laugh that seemed to fill every corner of the house. ‘Hardly. But I’m glad you like it.’

‘Better than amazing. Kelly, you should get the recipe.’