Page 44 of Worth the Risk

We didn’t have sex. Last night didn’t feel like it was about that. We were just together. Talking and laughing like we used to. It always came easily to us.

Spending time with her was my favorite thing in the world.

But where was she?

I pulled back the blankets and grabbed my clothes from the floor—I’d slept in just my boxers. Once I was dressed in my trousers and linen blazer from the wedding, I headed out into the living room and found that the sliding door was ajar again. This time, I could see that she was on the beach, doing yoga in the morning sun.

I stepped out onto the deck, watching her for a moment. She was on her hands and knees, back arched as she looked up at the sky. As I watched, she exhaled and rounded her spine.

She was wearing possibly the tightest clothes I’d ever seen, and my morning wood twitched in my pants. I shifted on my feet, and she must have seen movement out of the corner of her eye, because her head snapped in my direction.

I waved, and she got to her feet, picking up her yoga mat and shaking the sand off before rolling it up and tucking it under her arm. She wasn’t far from the deck, so she reached me quickly.

“Good morning.” I stepped into her, bending my head and pressing a kiss to her lips.

She didn’t stop me, but she was quick to step away.

I frowned, something twisting in my chest. “Zoey?”

She bit her bottom lip and glanced at the patio furniture on the deck. “Maybe we should talk.”

I didn’t like the sound of that at all, but I followed her to the wicker chairs. They were pointed toward the beach, but I pulled mine around to face her directly.

She ran her hand down her thighs and let out a long exhale before meeting my eyes. “Listen… I know that this week has been confusing-”

“Confusing? What do you mean? I’m not confused about anything.”

“I guess it’s just been confusing for me, then. I came here determined to make it through the week without falling apart because I knew I’d have to be close to you the whole time, and you’d broken my heart.” She didn’t look away as she spoke, so I could see the raw pain she still felt. It was right there in her eyes, evidence of my biggest regret. “And then, you show up at my bungalow and say all these things… things that I wanted you to say for so long. But it was already too late.”

“No, Angel.” I leaned forward, reaching for her hands, but she pulled them away with a shake of her head. “It’s not too late.”

“It is, Ford. I know that I might’ve sent you some mixed signals about that this week, but like I said, it’s been confusing for me. I’m not going to lie, it’s been tempting to take you back because I loved what we had together, despite my unhappiness with the secrecy of it all. But I’m not the same woman that accepted that. I need to be stronger than that, for me and for our baby.”

“It won’t be like that anymore. I’m done with the secrecy.”

She shook her head. “It’s more than just the secrecy. It’s the reason that we did it. The reason that you never put Delilah in her place and the reason that you broke up with me. It’s all about the promotion. And I know it’s important to you, but a job shouldn’t come before people. You didn’t just put it above me, you put it above yourself. You sacrificed your integrity for ambition.”

“Zoey, I should’ve told you before, but I didn’t want it to complicate things while I was trying to get you back. Dr. Serrano… he didn’t threaten my promotion that day. He threatened to transfer you to a different department.” Her eyes grew large and her breath hitched. “Yeah, I know. The asshole tried telling me it was stupid to put the promotion at risk and that he wasn’t going to let me do it. You know that his entire life is the hospital, and he thinks everyone should be like him.”

The look she sent my way said that she thought I already was.

“Don’t you see?” I said, clutching the arms of the chair to keep myself from reaching for her again. “He knew that I wasn’t like him, not really. I made some stupid decisions in my pursuit of the job, but I never would have given you up for it. I think he knew that, so he told me that if I didn’t end the relationship, he’d make the problem go away by transferring you to a different department.”

“He can’t do that.” But her voice was small. We both knew that if the chief of medicine requested the transfer, nursing management would have done it.

“I know how much you love the ER, that you bounced around several different departments before you landed there. You told me it’s where you belong, and all I could think about was how you chose to become a nurse even though your family is so wealthy, that it’s your calling and if I ended up ruining it for you, I’d never forgive myself.”

Her eyes glistened with tears, but there was fury in her expression. “You should have told me. Why in the hell would you just dump me like that?”

I held up my hands, as if I was facing a wild animal. “I made the wrong call. I just… I didn’t want you to make the sacrifice of voluntarily leaving the ER for me. It didn’t feel fair after everything you’d put up with for six months. The secrecy and Delilah and all that shit. It was a mistake, Zo. A huge mistake. I should’ve talked to you about what Serrano said and let you decide what you wanted to do.”

I could see that my words reached her, but she looked angry. I couldn’t blame her. I’d tried to handle the situation myself when I should’ve treated her like my partner and let her decide what to do. It seemed like such an obvious truth now, but at the time, I convinced myself of the right course of action and took it impulsively.

Zoey sat back in her chair, eyes shifting to the ocean behind me. She looked thoughtful for a moment, and I held my breath as I waited to see what she’d say next.

“I think… maybe you did make the right decision.”

Cold fear raced down my spine. “What?”