Page 34 of Calling a Cease-Fire

She turned to face me. “You need to stop looking at me like that.”

I pulled my gaze away and focused back on the road in front of me. “Like what?”

“Like you wish I was different. Or maybe trying to figure out how you could make things work between us.”

I laughed. “You assume a lot, you know?”

She shrugged. “No matter how many times I tell a guy I don’t do relationships, it almost always ends the same way.”

“And how’s that?”

“They get attached and hope I’ve magically changed.”

“Maybe you just haven’t met the right guy.”

“That.” She huffed and narrowed her eyes, pointing a finger at me. “Right there. That’s how it always starts. They all think they’re the special one who will set me straight. But they aren’t, and it doesn’t. I’ve been with plenty of guys I really liked, but it doesn’t change the fact that I don’t want a serious relationship. And it’s frustrating that guys can say that and people almost expect it. They accept it without a second thought. Call them a playboy and then glamorize it. But a woman? No. We must be broken or something. Need to be changed.”

“Believe it or not, most of us experience the same thing. I was a playboy for very many years, and almost every girl I dated tried to change me. To make me want forever with them.”

Her brows rose high on her forehead. “So what changed?”

I smirked. “I never said anything changed. Again, you assumed.”

She rolled her eyes. “You didn’t correct me.”

I didn’t think it would help to admit it was her I specifically thought I could easily fall for. “I’m more open to the idea of something serious now. I think watching all my friends find love has made me want that too. Or maybe I’m just getting bored and ready for the next stage of life, but I haven’t found anyone I could see a future with. So maybe, like you, I’m just not made for that.”

She was quiet, and after a moment I asked, “Why are you so against it? The idea of love and commitment? Were you hurt so badly you’re never willing to risk your heart again or something?"

She shrugged. “Nope. Not really.” A long sigh left her lips. “Although one guy tried to psychoanalyze me with daddy issues.”

“Daddy issues?” I’d never really heard her talk about her parents or childhood, so I wasn’t really sure of any of it.

“My dad walked out when I was five. Never heard from him again. My mom had a revolving door of men in and out of our life. None of them ever stuck around though.”

“Oh.” I would never understand men who walked away from their kids. But then again, maybe fathers like the one from the call today should just walk away. The system wasn’t great, but it had to be better than some abusive asshole.

“But I don’t think it’s all about that.” I hated the hint of disappointment when she said, “Because I’d learned as a teen it wasn’t always the guys who were the issues. It was my mom. She believed my dad was her one and only true love. I think the way he destroyed her left her unable to let someone else in.”

“Maybe you’re scared the same thing could happen to you.” I caught her scowl out of the corner of my eye and did my best to keep a straight face. She was adorable when she did that, but this wasn’t the time or place to annoy her. It would probably make her shut down, and I got the sense she needed to get this out.

“Or maybe I just don’t see the point. I don’t really want kids. I like living by myself. I’m kind of selfish⁠—”

“Bullshit,” I clipped, cutting her off. “You don’t want to upset your friends. You don’t want to risk hurting me. You take on a planning project that Nicole was supposed to do—one you have zero interest or investment in—just to help her out. You helped take care of Lyla when she was injured. You’re going with me tonight to a rage room, when you probably don’t even want to, because you know I need it. Oh, and you volunteer at an animal shelter. You’re a lot of things, Mia. But you’re far from selfish.”

She gasped. “Wait, how do you know about the animal shelter? Did Lyla tell you?”

I chuckled and shook my head. That was her only takeaway from everything I just said? “Saw your picture on the wall a couple of months ago when we did the photo shoot for the calendar.”

A slight blush formed on her cheeks, and then she sent me another glare. “Don’t you tell anyone.”

“Why?” I sent her a quick glance. “Afraid people will realize you’re more than sarcasm, eye rolls, and barbs.”

“No. They’ll all want to come, and I do it to get away from people. The animals are easier to deal with.”

“That seems like a very Mia thing to say.”

“It’s the truth.” Her lips puckered and she crossed her arms.