Page 61 of Be More Capybara

She smiled. ‘Of course I do. I’ve enjoyed today. Thank you for making the effort.’

‘It was long overdue. Sorry.’

‘You’ve always sent me flowers.’

‘Confession time. My PA always sent you flowers.’

‘Well, in that case, you can cook for me next year as well.’ She laughed. ‘Assuming you’re still here.’

‘I’ll still be here.’

‘You’re not tempted to get a job in the States so you can see your girls?’

He sighed. ‘I’ve considered it. But neither of them has reached out to me or replied when I’ve tried getting in touch.’

‘I’m sure they will eventually.’

‘You’re more sure than I am. Anyway, I’ve felt more loved and cared for here than I have for a long time in New York.’ He carried on loading the dishwasher.

‘Why was New York so appealing for so long?’ she asked. ‘And don’t say career because you could have built a decent career here, or just spent a couple of years in New York for the experience and then come back?’

Nigel stopped loading the dishwasher. Now would be a great opportunity to get everything out in the open.

‘Several reasons.’

‘It wasn’t just Helen, was it?’

‘What about Helen?’ How much did she know on that front?

‘That you thought she didn’t love you as much as you loved her.’

That was either a very lucky guess, or she could read his mind. Whichever it was, there was no point in denying it. ‘That was part of it.’

‘And the rest? I wasn’t oblivious to the fact that you stayed away from here as much as possible after you went to uni.’

He’d wanted to be open about this for so long, but now that the opportunity was there in front of him, saying it out loud seemed impossible.

Nancy shut her laptop. ‘If you don’t want to talk about it yet, we can let it go, but I think you need to be honest with yourself and me if you ever want some peace.’

He took a deep breath. ‘I saw something I shouldn’t have when I was staying in your flat in London over the summer holidays, just before I went down to Oxford. Dad with …’

‘You don’t have to say anymore. I thought as much. I hope it wasn’t too graphic. I was fully aware that your father was unfaithful to me on numerous occasions.’

‘Compared with the way he died, it was positively vanilla. But I didn’t know you knew he was having an affair until Mark said a few weeks ago. Why did you put up with it?’

‘It was a different time. And I was happy here. He sowed his wild oats and let me get on with my life. I wasn’t exactly a saint.’

‘I’m not judging you for Julia.’

‘Thank you. But that wasn’t what I meant.’

What the hell did she mean then? Then he put two and two together. Surely not. Nigel felt faint. He grabbed a chair and sat down by the table. ‘How many other half-siblings have I got?’

Nancy smiled. ‘None.’

‘Thank God. For a minute there, I thought you were about to tell me Mark had a different father.’

‘No. You might be complete opposites, but you are both Xander’s sons.’ She got up and headed towards the sink with her empty mug. ‘I appreciate you not telling me at the time. I’m not sure what I would have done, knowing that you knew. When you repeatedly went out of your way to avoid your father, it dawned on me what must’ve happened. I’m sorry you felt you had to move away. I’ve been intending to broach the subject with you ever since Xander’s funeral, but we never seemed to be alone until today. Did you tell anyone?’