Page 3 of From Scotland with Love

“I absolutely do, you’ve been so kind. I know you have a lot on your plate too!” Alex sat down at her desk, which was parallel with Lori’s. “I just don’t know how you do it, you seem so calm and collected. I’m freaking out at this workload every day.” Alex grimaced at her computer screen.

“Do I?” Lori shook her head, and wondered if anyone had ever really come close to guessing how she actually felt inside. “I’m just trying to take each day as it comes.” She sighed and drank more of her coffee, welcoming the caffeine. “I think the key is to remind yourself that we’re not saving lives here – no one is going to die if we don’t select the right style, or if we're late with a delivery or forget to prioritise a customer complaint. So what’s the worst that can happen?”

Alex tore her eyes away from her computer screen. “Really? That’s what you do?” She chuckled to herself in a daze. “You know, you’re absolutely right!”

Lori had never asked Alex her age, it wasn’t a thing that mattered to her usually. But as similar as they were in age, Alex had been a buyer for far longer and strangely, Lori felt that she was fast becoming the blonde girl’s mentor.

“Sometimes we will just never have enough time to get through things. That’s normal!” Lori leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs, resigning herself to make this her break time. She would work through lunch.

Alex sighed and suddenly put her hands over her face. Startled, Lori looked around to see if anyone was listening to their conversation, luckily no eyes watched them, all likely too engrossed in their own work to notice. She spun her chair closer to her upset colleague.

“Hey, it’s OK! I can help you!”

“I can’t take any more of your help!” Alex looked almost close to tears, she bit her lip and glanced around the office. “I’m not sure how long I can do this!” she whispered, as her eyes continued to dart about the other desks.

“It’s just a tough spot, you’ll get through it!” Lori put her hand on Alex’s arm, trying to comfort her as best she could.

“That's just it - I don’t think it is anymore!” Alex leaned her head on her hand and looked sideways at Lori, her eyes red. “I haven’t slept properly in months!” she sighed shakily, and a tear fell from one eye. She wiped it away swiftly. “To be honest, I think it’s more like years. I don’t eat well either, everyday I make a sandwich or I plan to go out and get something, but things always crop up and I end up just eating shitty rice cakes all day.” Lori had certainly noticed that even before she joined the menswear department, Alex had been rapidly losing weight. “And now... my boyfriend has split up with me!” another tear fell and she covered the side of her face with her hand, shielding herself from any onlookers.

Lori squeezed her arm. “OK breathe, don’t think anymore on this for a second, just breathe.” They both sat together in quiet companionship until Lori spoke first. “I think you may need a wee holiday? Maybe just some days away?” Lori suggested quietly.

“Wee?” Alex looked up blankly.

“Aye.” Lori slipped up, the words came out of her mouth without her realising, and she quickly caught herself from letting her Scottish accent go any further. “I mean, how about going on a short vacation?”

“A vacation?” Alex shook her head in alarm. “No way, who would do my job when I’m gone? I can’t even take a day off when I’m ill!”

“OK well at least just take some time right now, go for a walk around the block. Clear your head; maybe switch off your phone and leave the office for a bit?” Lori patted her hand gently.

Alex dabbed her eyes slowly, her shoulders slumped. “You’re right, I’ll go out for a walk.”

Lori spent the next couple of hours in front of her computer, consumed by the constant flow of emails. She noticed that Alex had been away for some time, and as a result had to answer her desk phone and take messages, writing each one down on a post-it note. The coloured bits of paper very quickly covered Alex’s desk, with various departments chasing up outstanding issues. The day sped through to early evening, and Lori decided she needed an early night. As she started to pack up her things, her phone rang. It was Frankie.

“Hi Frankie!” Lori breezed. “Everything OK?”

“Hi Lori, well – yes, things are fine. I wondered if you could spare a minute? Could you come to my office?”

“Sure!” Lori ended the call and walked upstairs to the management offices. She liked and admired her boss; the older lady was ambitious, clever and valued her staff according to their talents rather than their contacts or personality. She almost always met Frankie each week for a coffee and catch-up. She had once overheard some of the other buyers talking about this fact: “She’s so playing the game, all she wants is to be at the top and she's just using Frankie to get there!” Lori didn’t blame them for being suspicious, but more than anything she simply liked Frankie, and enjoyed learning from her as a colleague - besides, it was the older woman who had asked her for a coffee in the first place. Since then the pair had developed a good working relationship, and Lori felt lucky to have Frankie on her side.

She walked up to the receptionist’s desk, who immediately waved her through: “Just go ahead Lori, she’s expecting you” the young girl with glasses smiled briefly, then cast her eyes back over sheets of paper before her. Lori found Frankie was standing with her back to the door, looking out the window at the city lights. The sun had already dropped behind the high buildings.

Lori hovered at the open door not wanting to disturb the moment, but coughed to get her boss’s attention.

“Lori, come in! Sorry, I was somewhere else.” She gestured to the leather sofa beside her that sat in front of the window, with the skyline of the city looming impressively at its back. She sat down on the sofa beside Lori, and took off her thick black glasses, pinching the bridge of her nose, her eyes closed. With short ash blonde hair, red lipstick and smart black dungarees, Frankie looked years younger than her age. But today she most definitely appeared exhausted.

“Everything OK?” Lori sat upright on the uncomfortable sofa, waiting for whatever news may be coming.

“Yes, it’s all go here isn’t it?” Frankie crossed her legs and leaned back. “How are you coping in your new role?”

“Oh I’m getting there, constantly learning something new every day. But I’m really thankful for the opportunity, and for Julian!” Lori had been an assistant for many years and if it wasn’t for Frankie’s promotion, she’d still be there. Lori felt indebted to her boss, her promotion was a huge compliment, considering all the many other girls who would claw each other out of the way for a similar opportunity. But Frankie had offered the job to Lori with no interview. Something unheard of, especially in the fashion industry. She also wanted to give a small shout-out to Julian, for his recent efforts with the back-catalogues.

“Good. Yes it’ll take some time Lori, but I have every faith in you.” She smiled briefly then took off her chunky black earrings and placed them on the table next to her discarded glasses. Massaging her earlobes, she sighed. “So I had a phone call from Alex earlier. She’s resigned.”

“What? But I was only talking to her a few hours ago!”

“Yes well, it turns out she’s been struggling here... and she’s had personal things going on too.”

Lori couldn’t believe the news. She had been sure Alex would be fine. They all had bad days; Lori had them too, that was the norm in the industry.