Page 62 of The Killer’s Mark

‘Something like that,’ Poe said. ‘Ninety-nine per cent of what I do is me talking to people who haven’t got the foggiest idea. But do it enough times and eventually you’ll speak to someone who knows something. Or they’ll know someone who knows something. Tilly did the maths for it once. She called it “Poe’s Dumb Luck Formula”.’

‘How about that bug-eyed idiot?’ Esmerée said, pointing at a gormless-looking waiter. ‘The one who’s just wiped snot on his own jacket.’

‘We want to talk to the Chinese community, Esmerée. Rule number one of finding out stuff: ask the right people. He’s white with ginger hair. Therefore he is not the right people.’

‘Seems like you have a whole bunch of rules for something with no rules, Poe.’

‘That’s exactly what Tilly says. She thinks I just make it up as I go along.’

‘Do you?’

‘Of course,’ he said. ‘We all do. But when you’ve been doing it as long as I have, you get a feel for who to ask and who not to.’

Esmerée tapped the side of her nose sarcastically. Did a head-bow then put on an accent. ‘Ah, Daniel Poe-san; you are truly the voice of experience.’

‘A little less racism, please, Esmerée. And “san” is a Japanese term of respect, not Chinese.’

‘Sorry.’

‘That’s OK. Anyway, why do you care how I get it done? The important thing is that it does get done.’

‘I’m thinking of becoming a private dick when I get older.’

‘I thought you wanted to be a pathologist?’

‘Who am I kidding?’ she said. ‘I don’t exist. How am I gonna get into med school?’

‘Tilly,’ Poe said. ‘That’s how.’

‘Tilly? What about her?’

‘You want to exist, she’ll give you a background that even I couldn’t crack.’

‘She’d do that for me? Why?’

‘Because she’s nice.’

‘Maybe I’d better stop being a jerk to her then.’

‘Maybe you had. And not for the reason you think. She’ll help create a new identity for you regardless.’

‘Then …?’

‘Y.M.C.A.’ by Village People began blasting out from Poe’s inside pocket. He scrabbled about for his phone while the lunchtime diners scowled at his lack of restaurant etiquette. He accepted the call.

‘Tilly? What’s up?’

‘Nothing, Poe. I just wanted to let you know that my preliminary search for Kai Jin found nothing after his second year at the Royal College of Art. Hester Flynt was right – he did disappear.’

‘You think he went back to China?’

‘I’ve backdoored my way into Baidu, the Chinese equivalent of Google, and there was nothing there either. Not even in the metadata. I’ll keep looking, but I’m not hopeful.’

‘OK, we’re just about to start knocking on doors. Catch up later?’

After Poe had ended the call, Esmerée said, ‘I thought you were into punk rock?’

‘I am. And that’s the main reason you shouldn’t annoy Tilly. She’ll change your ringtone to something you hate, or make your satnav only go to vegan supermarkets, or something equally annoying. The Village People song will be because I argued with her earlier about Batman.’