Page 84 of Just for the Season

Marcus hesitates for barely a second before saying, ‘Thank you. See you there.’

‘On it. My car. Faster.’ Simon sprints to get his keys and we’re in the car within under a minute.

His BMW is very souped up and he drives like a lunatic. Marcus calls us with updates on Ruby’s whereabouts and it becomes clear that she’s definitely heading towards Heathrow. Stressfully, though, the AirTag only updates every few minutes.

Simon and I make amazing progress, due to Simon’s complete disregard of speed limits and courtesy to other drivers. He doesn’t like smart motorways because they force you to stick to seventy, so drives on parallel A-roads, and we get to Heathrow just after Marcus.

I’ve been checking flights during the drive and it looks like Ruby’s most likely to be heading for Terminal 5, which is much bigger than Terminal 2. Marcus has gone straight there.

‘You help him.’ Simon is already running as he calls over his shoulder, ‘I’ll go to Terminal 2 just in case.’

Terminal 5 departures is huge and it is full of people.

I feel as though I’m running like a headless chicken, looking for a needle in a haystack. I push through throngs and throngs of people, my eyes darting everywhere, constantly thinking I’ve seen Ruby, only to be disappointed. There are so very many young, slim, long-haired women wearing similar clothes.

‘Frankie.’ Marcus has called from somewhere behind me.

I turn round and see him a few feet away, eyes wild. I run to him and hug him hard for a few seconds.

‘It’s hopeless,’ he says.

‘No. It isn’t. You just came across me. We can find her.’

‘What if she’s already through security?’

‘The queues are long. We’ll find her.’ I speak with a confidence I don’t feel. ‘Hang on.’

‘Yes.’ Marcus nods, clearly having had the same thought as me. ‘Why are we both running around here? Let’s just go straight to the security check.’

We sprint in that direction, Marcus outpacing me.

‘She isn’t here,’ he says when I reach him. ‘She must have gone through. I might have to involve the police. I don’t think she’ll get stopped. Some airlines let over-fourteens fly alone.’

‘Let me just check the loos.’ I run towards the nearest ladies’.

And, thank goodness, Ruby is coming out just as I get there. Looking on the one hand grown-up but on the other so, so young and like she should certainly not be travelling alone.

Even though there’s every chance she’ll hate it, I can’t help launching myself at her and hugging her very tightly.

‘I have to call your dad,’ I tell her. ‘He loves you so much. He’s so worried about you.’

‘Why are you here? Is he still seeing you?’

‘No. No. He split up with me because he loves you so much. But after he discovered you weren’t with Libby he called to ask what time you left the café, and I’d inadvertently seen your phone on Skyscanner, and Simon and I offered to help so we both came.’

She nods, her face stony.

‘Oh, Ruby.’ I hug her more tightly, but then let go when she doesn’t respond. I call Marcus and text Simon, and then make a snap decision. ‘Ruby. My father abandoned me and my mother when I was little. He moved to Cardiff. And then my mother, in her turn, abandoned me when I was thirteen. She’s married a few people. The second one, the one after my father, wanted her to move to Paris with him and really didn’t want a teenager tagging along. Fortunately my wonderful grandmother Rose looked after me and I’ve always had a home with her. I’m thirty-five, over twenty years older than you, and I’ve only just understood that my mother leaving me was all about her and not about me. Your dad helped me understand that. You are incredibly, indescribably lucky that you have such a wonderful dad who tries so very hard to be both father and mother to you. So lucky.’

Ruby stares at me without speaking. Then her gaze shifts to beyond me and I hear Marcus’s voice.

‘Ruby.’ He’s tearful. ‘God. Ruby. Please never run away again. Just talk to me. Please. Anything could have happened to you. I love you, Ruby.’ He holds his arms out to her and for a long time she just looks kind of blankly at him, until eventually she walks forward and into his hug.

I mouth goodbye to Marcus and he says, ‘Thank you so much,’ and then I leave him there, still tearful, hugging Ruby very tightly against him.

And, even though it hurts hugely, I couldn’t be prouder of him for choosing Ruby over me. He had to. I know that. I love him, and the man I love would never have abandoned his child. And maybe, if he ever feels that he’s able to have a relationship, he’ll still want to have one with me, and maybe I’ll still be waiting.

But that’s a very long time down the line, I think as I head back to Simon’s car. In the meantime, I do need to forget about Marcus and get on with my life away from him. Spending this time together at the airport with a common goal, loving him so very much, but not being able to be in his life, or have him in mine, just twisted the knife. I don’t want to bump into him in Milbury and I don’t want him to have to avoid me. I’m going to go back to London and stay with friends until I find a place of my own.