Page 196 of Halo

My brothers tell her about how they’d already be halfway through a day’s work while I was still wandering around behind them asking questions, convinced I was helping because somebody had given me a bucket to carry. My sister remembers me following Mama everywhere, and one of my nephews swears there’s photographic evidence somewhere of me wearing nothing but cowboy boots and underwear while trying to rope a lawn chair.

“I was four.”

“You were six,” my brother corrects.

“Fuck off.”

Leah laughs so hard she has to press a hand against her stomach, and I immediately look over.

“I’m okay,” she assures me, still laughing.

Every time another story starts, her hand finds my thigh beneath the table, giving it a little squeeze while she looks up at me with this bright smile that makes the embarrassment worth it. There’s something about watching her learn these pieces of me that gets under my skin in the best possible way. She listens like none of it is insignificant, like the stupid little boy running around this ranch is somebody she wishes she could have known too.

Out in the yard, Grady has been absorbed into the younger generation so completely that I’ve barely seen him since dinner started. One of the great-grandkids takes him toward the fence to see the cattle, and twenty minutes later they’re all down by the pond bothering the ducks, Grady’s little bald head easy to pick out among them.

Mama sits near the center of everything, watching the chaos with that quiet smile of hers.

At some point her blanket slips from her knees, and before I can get up, Leah reaches over and fixes it for her.

Mama catches her hand.

Leah smiles and keeps holding it.

And sitting there with my mother on one side, Leah beside me, and Grady running across the same yard I grew up in, I realize I can’t remember the last time coming home felt this much like home.

By the time we get Grady settled into the guest room, he’s barely awake enough to get through brushing his teeth. Leah sits on the edge of the bed while I tuck the covers around him, and he reaches one sleepy hand toward her.

“Night, Mrs. Harrison.”

She takes his hand and kisses his knuckles. “Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Love you.”

“I love you too.”

His eyes are already closed before we make it to the door.

I walk Leah down the hall to my old bedroom with my hand at the small of her back. She’s exhausted, but there’s something peaceful about her now that wasn’t there earlier, and when I pull back the covers, she climbs in without arguing with me for once.

“There she is,” I murmur. “Finally learning to follow directions.”

“Don’t get used to it.”

I lean over her, intending to kiss her forehead, but she catches the back of my neck and pulls my mouth to hers instead.

The kiss starts soft, almost sleepy, until she kisses me again and her fingers slide into my hair. I brace myself above her carefully, mindful of everything her body has been through, while her mouth moves against mine with a tenderness that makes my chest ache.

“I love you,” she whispers against my lips.

“I love you too, darlin’.”

She kisses my cheek, then the corner of my mouth before settling back against the pillows.

I pull the blanket over her and tuck it around her shoulders.

“You coming to bed?”

“In a little while. I’m gonna look around downstairs for a bit. Hang out with my brothers and sister.”