Page 19 of A Kingdom of Magic and Rain

“Thank you for that.” I gave a wry smile.

“Shall we?” He gestured toward the front door. “Killian is waiting by the carriage.”

After we had boarded the coach, Gray looked at me expectantly from his seat across from me. He clearly wanted to continue our conversation from earlier, but I suddenly felt unsure about sharing the truth with him.

“I hope the rain holds off until we’re done helping the farmer,” I attempted small talk.

He glanced out the window at the gray sky outside before refocusing on me. “I hope so, too. We wouldn’t want to be caught in a downpour in the middle of the field.”

Quiet invaded the space between us as the carriage began moving, the only sound coming from the wheels rolling over the ground.

“You were going to tell me something before we got interrupted,” Gray prompted after a few minutes.

I swallowed, unsure of how to respond. We were on our way to help a farmer with his crops, which were dying because of the weather. The weather that was far worse than what my father and I had led Gray to believe. How would the lord react upon learning the truth? I hoped for understanding and compassion, but what if he offered outrage and loathing? Worse yet, he could tell others the truth about the state of the kingdom, undermining my father and starting a panic. I couldn’t tell him. It was important to keep the information contained.

“I changed my mind,” I said simply.

Gray blinked, clearly puzzled by my answer. “All right. Well, if you change your mind again, you can confide in me.”

I hardly knew the lord, but for some reason, his words rang true.

“In your high-profile position…how do you know who to trust?” I asked him. I had never sought that kind of guidance from my father because until now, I’d never had anything to hide.

He chuckled. “I’m afraid I’m not the best person to answer that question, considering my circle of trust includes only three individuals.”

“Tom, Thea, and Killian,” I surmised, and he nodded. Not being included on the list didn’t offend me, but it did remind me that the lord and I were new acquaintances. I shouldn’t rush to place my trust in him. With that decision made, I relaxed into the seat, the tension that had gathered in my limbs leaving my body. “I know you’re new to the role, but do you enjoy being a lord?” I asked Gray, eager to learn more about him.

“I do,” he replied. “Though the position does not come without its challenges.”

“You’re very proficient at it from what I have observed.” I paid him a compliment.

“Thank you.” He gave a small smile. “Honestly, people just want to know that you care. You coming with me today will show them that you do. And the fact that you have finally decided to train is a testament to it as well.”

I tried not to wince at the word “finally” as I looked out the carriage window.

“I know I should have begun my training long ago,” I admitted, lost in thought. “The truth is—” I swallowed before I forged on, “—when I wasn’t able to unlock my magic at eighteen, it was easier to lose myself in something else.” Someone else. “Instead of rising to the challenge.”

“But now your engagement is off,” Gray said carefully, reading between the lines.

My mind flashed back to the moment in the past that would forever be seared in my mind, and I took a breath to fend off sudden tears. I could feel Gray’s gaze on me, but I refused to meet it, my eyes glued to the scenery outside.

“The past is in the past, you have said so yourself,” he continued. “You’re rising to the challenge now.”

I was rising to the challenge. I just hoped it wasn’t too late.

My anxiety spiked when the carriage hit a rough country road, letting me know that we were close to our destination.

“Bellamy has been struggling with maintaining his farm for a while now,” Gray said as the coach jumped over the uneven terrain. “Even before the cold snap. Ever since his wife passed away and his children moved out.”

I felt a pang in my heart for the poor lone farmer. Depending on how big his farm was, I could see it being difficult for him to sustain it with his powers alone. And the cold weather had only made it worse.

“Have you helped him before?” I asked, finally looking back at the lord.

“I have. I travel through the area often and aid in maintaining the fields. I consider it one of my most important duties.”

“I’m sure the people appreciate it.”

“They do. And they will appreciate your help when you are able to provide it.”