Page 53 of A Secret In The Garden

“Excuse me?” he said, suddenly matching my grin.

“You’re always in suits. I think James Bond is much more fitting for you than Batman, even if Sowerby is Evil Alfred…friend.” I wiped the beads of sweat off my forehead and removed my gloves as I stood, grateful for the break to stretch my aching back.

A devilish smirk came over his face as his dark brown eyes danced with trouble and amusement. My insides sparked and vibrated when he looked so playful, especially after just seeing him appear so frigid and distant. Everyone in the house seemed gloomy and on edge since Darius had returned. If I had thought the manor had been stuffy and burdened before, it felt doubly so now.

Glad to see my friend back, I waited for what ridiculousness was about to come out of his mouth.

“Would that make you Moneypenny or Pussy Galore, then?” He managed a straight face that absolutely simmered with playful charm. Seeing him smile that way felt like cinder blocks were lifted from my shoulders.

Laughter bubbled up out of me. “Neither. I would want to be Xenia Onatopp from Goldeneye. She was the one who used her strength and seduction to kill, squeezing the men to death with her thighs.” I made a show squatting, which I’d been doing 47,000 times daily while working here in the conservatory. “I think my thighs might be stronger than hers at this point.” I raised an eyebrow in challenge but was unable to keep a straight face. It was stupid how candid I could be with him, and I loved it.

His eyes darkened and, as slow as dripping molasses, trailed down my body. I felt the blush creep into my cheeks as they heated. He couldn’t look at me like that. I was far too lonely and delusional for him to look at me like that.

“So, friend⁠—”

“Don’t do that,” he stated, his voice low with command as he took a few steps toward me.

“Do what?” I said, even though I knew what he meant. The first few times I’d called him a friend, it had been a loud, showy way of making sure he knew that that’s what we were, that he couldn’t get rid of me just because he was scared—because, with real friendship, you don’t always get to pick it. Sometimes, we find the things and people that we need where they were never supposed to be found. It doesn’t make them any less real.

I realized at that moment how much it would devastate me if he had killed Hester. It would mean that everything between us had been a lie, and it made my anxieties spike. My skin suddenly felt hot and too tight.

Now, I found myself calling him a friend out of frustration. It would be easier to be friends after I left Blackwood Manor, and that’s how it needed to stay, even if I was having a hard time keeping him in the friend category. I had never really had a lot of friends, or boyfriends for that matter, but I knew I felt differently about him, even if I shouldn’t. I had so little experience with men, but I knew the swirling butterflies in my stomach told me this wasn’t friend territory, though I didn’t really know what else to consider him.

He was so close to me now that our chests were almost brushing up against one another as his masculine presence towered over me. I felt so small and short when he stood this near, and it made my insides tense in a pleasing way. This was an example of why it was so important that he wasn’t lying to me, that he really wasn’t the man everyone believed him to be. It was the difference between feeling safe and protected next to his large, strong body and feeling like he would overpower me and hurt me…or worse.

The tension crackled between us as it always did when our bodies got this close. When they were, it was hard to think about anything other than wanting him to touch me—wanting to touch him and trying to fight off wondering what it would feel like, if it would be shocking or comforting.

I thought we could hate each other and the electricity between us would still be there, sparking more. But that was the real trouble—I didn’t hate him, and he didn’t hate me. It was like two magnets were given brains and flesh, and even though we were scared and didn’t want to join with the other one, we couldn’t help it, and we couldn’t stop it. It wasn’t up to us; it was a force beyond nature, something predestined the moment we were put in each other’s presence. And even if our hearts and our minds couldn’t match up or agree, there was no ignoring the fact that we craved each other more intensely with every interaction.

I turned and continued my work, mostly because I didn’t want him to see my eyes. It was too easy for him to read me. “You were a lot nicer when you were in New York,” I teased, not wanting the lighter conversation to be over yet.

“And you were a lot farther away,” he said.

My stomach tightened. What was that supposed to mean?

“Did you hear back from the lawyers?” I decided to change the subject to something safer. “Have you heard any more from your father? I saw a lot of people carrying things into the new addition. Can I get a tour now that it’s finished?”

“No. It’s a space filled with a bunch of very dangerous, very illegal things that don’t concern you and that you don’t want to get tangled up with, although it does bring up a good point. Eliza, after you leave Blackwood Manor, things will forever be different for you. You need to know how to protect yourself.” He glanced at his watch before pulling his phone from his suit jacket and replacing it after an irritated look.

There was a high-pitched tone that filled the space between us. That was the security ping. I’d been hearing it go off in the distance every time I walked through the main house.

“Quarter after six, I want you to meet me in the shooting range out back. I’m going to teach you how to shoot.”

He turned and left before I could argue.

Chapter 18

Eliza

I wasn’t supposed to meet Jasper at the shooting range for another twenty minutes. It was time I should have used to continue planting in the greenhouse, but I felt dirty and smelly, and if I was going to be in proximity of Jasper at the shooting range, then I needed to shower, so I took off early and headed up to my room.

Or I was going to.

Until I realized that Jasper was probably already out there waiting for me, which meant I had a few minutes to check another room before I quickly showered and hurried out to meet him. I’d been trying to sneak around the manor when no one was paying attention to take a look through some of the older rooms that I didn’t think were even used anymore. I had only made my way through three rooms, and it had been a major disappointment. One had been completely empty, not even curtains, and the other two were used as some sort of ammo-making space. Empty shell casings—at least that’s what I assumed they were—littered the butcher block countertops. Dark-stained wooden shelves lined the back walls, which were all filled with small boxes. Several large gun safes were in both rooms. It had smelled like sulfur, sharp wood, and metal with a hint of paper, like what a new instruction pamphlet smells like. I had felt weird and out of place and after quickly looking through them for anything that could be useful and finding nothing, I left.

I was too busy, and it was too dangerous to do more than a room here and there. I didn’t know what I was looking for. Something of Hester’s or Darius’s—or even Jasper’s—that told me something solid about what had happened. I kept the locket in my pocket or in my palm in the hopes Hester would help guide me. So far nothing.

Before I left the conservatory, I saw movement around the corner going toward the front of the house. Sowerby—and he was moving quickly. The gun range was on the other side of the property. Whatever he was doing, it wasn’t in the main house and that was all the go-ahead I needed. Sowerby had grown more friendly with me, but there was always this underlying hardness to him that I never fully trusted. If he caught me snooping, it would be bad. Worse than if Jasper got me…maybe.