Page 92 of The Matrimonial Advertisement

“Tired,” she said. “It’s been a long, exhausting day.”

“You may avail yourself of my shoulder, if you like.”

A smile touched her lips. “Do you know, I believe I shall.” She rested her head lightly on his arm. It was a bit awkward given the disparity in their heights.

“Here.” Justin shifted position, setting his arm around her and drawing her close against his chest. “This is better.”

“Mmm. Much more comfortable.”

He held her gently as the hansom cab rolled toward Half Moon Street. They didn’t speak. There was nothing to say, really.

But as each minute passed, their mutual silence seemed to gain in significance.

“Helena,” he said at last. His voice was rough as gravel. “In the theatre, you said that the something more than friendship we spoke of on the train was love.”

She stiffened a little in his arms. “I didn’t mean that you…that we—”

“Yes, I know. You were speaking in general terms. Philosophically, not personally.” He exhaled heavily. “The thing is…I’m not sure I even know what love is, philosophically or personally.”

“Haven’t you ever been in love before?”

“Not that I’m aware.”

“Never?” She sounded incredulous.

“Is it so shocking?”

“A little. You’re a man of the world. Handsome and of good character. I’d have thought ladies would have flocked to you.”

Handsome? He filed that compliment away for later. “There have been some women in my life, certainly, but I didn’t love them. And, er, I wouldn’t call them ladies.”

“Oh.”

He paused. “Have you?”

“Have I what?”

“Ever been in love?”

“No. Not in a romantic way. Though I did once have a tendre for one of my brother’s friends. Lord Hartright. He used to tease me and pull my hair. I hoped, when I grew up, he might marry me.”

Justin didn’t know quite how to reply to that. Was it ridiculous to be jealous of a boy from her childhood? Yes, he decided. Patently absurd. And yet…

“Does this budding lothario currently reside in London?” he asked with studied indifference. “Are we likely to cross paths with him?”

“Lord Hartright? Oh no, he’s long since married and retired to his estate in Northumberland. He has six children now, I believe.”

“He didn’t leave you heartbroken, then.”

Helena laughed softly. “No, indeed. He didn’t have my heart. I was never in love with him. I’ve never been in love with anyone.”

“No? You must have had an army of suitors.”

“Not quite so many as that. In truth, my father didn’t think any man was good enough for the daughter of the Earl of Castleton.”

“No doubt he was right.”

“It mattered little in the end. I soon went into mourning—first for him and then for Giles. Courtship and marriage was the last thing on my mind. As for falling in love…I have no experience at all.” She grew serious. “But I know what it is to love a person. It’s what I felt for my mother and brother.”