Page 65 of Married to Lies

She squeezed me back, laughing. “I’m just hoping I don’t leak before this is over.”

I wasn’t sure where she was leaking from, so I didn’t ask. “Let’s hurry up and get our food then,” I said. “We don’t want any leakage.”

After the security guard let us in, a host took us to a table near the windows. The pale winter sunshine came through, warming my face and making her umber skin glow. Once we’d given our coffee orders and were alone again, she said, “I hear congratulations are in order.”

I gave a wry smile. “If you want to congratulate me for marrying a practical stranger on New Year’s Day, then yes.”

Worried, she asked, “Are you sure about New Year’s Day? Don’t you want a little bit more time to get to know him?”

“It couldn’t wait,” I said. “Besides, I’m not going to be more ready two months from now.”

She tilted her head side to side and pursed her lips like she could see where I was coming from but couldn’t quite agree.

“So will you be my maid of honor?” I asked. “I don’t have a cute little gift for you, but I do have something else to give.”

“Of course I will.” She leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs. “And you don’t have to give me anything.”

“I do have to give you the truth,” I replied, the weight of my past threatening to press on my chest until it suffocated me. “I’ve been living a lie.”

Jada straightened in her seat. Skepticism or maybe weariness changed her gaze. “What is it?” she asked.

I took a breath and said, “Come closer. I don’t want anyone to hear.”

Her face went ashen. “Rei, what is it?”

With my stomach squirming, I moved my chair to be by hers, and in a hushed whisper, shared with her the same news I’d told Quentin the day before. That I wasn’t really an employee of Radiant Cleaning. I owned the whole thing. The only time I paused was when the server brought us our drinks and took our orders.

When I finished my story, Jada looked surprised but not disbelieving. “I always wondered why you didn’t complain about your boss,” she said with a teasing smile. “But why keep it a secret? Why not be proud of all you’ve accomplished?”

This. This was the hard part. The part I hadn’t told Quentin because it would derail our marriage and leave my employees at risk.

I took a breath. “Something happened five years ago, and it cost me everything.”

“What happened?” she pressed in a whisper.

It was hard to say. Suddenly, I understood Quentin’s preference for silence. But Jada was waiting for my answer, and I wanted to give it to her, no matter how hard it felt. Conrad couldn’t be the person who knew the most about me.

I looked around to make sure no one was listening, but everyone was absorbed in their own conversations. Even if someone was trying to listen, they couldn’t with the acoustic music playing over the speaker and the low hum of people talking. “I started cleaning houses during college,” I began.

“I worked for a housekeeping agency making minimum wage, and then I found out how much the company was getting paid for me to do my work. I thought, I can talk to people and find clients just as well as they can. Why not cut out the agency, give the clients a better deal, and make more money for myself? I could make my own schedule, handle issues with people directly, and cut out the middleman.”

Jada nodded, but it was clear she still didn’t understand what the big deal was. She was waiting for the other shoe to drop, and I’d get there... eventually.

“Well, my first client loved the work I did, so she told a friend, who told another friend, and pretty soon, I was missing classes to work because I had more clients than time. It felt crazy to go to college to get a job when I already had a job that was paying me really well.”

Jada nodded her understanding. “I mean, that makes sense.”

I smoothed my hands over my dark denim jeans. Remembering that time in my life brought up so many conflicting feelings. On one hand, I was proud of my younger self for seeing the opportunity and going for it. On the other, life would have been so much simpler if I hadn’t. But the past had already been written, so I continued. “There was this one family I worked for that I really connected with. The mom became my friend, and her husband was a really good businessman. He helped mentor me and told me I should get into commercial cleaning instead of doing houses. He said I would earn money more consistently and have an easier time scheduling. He even gave me my first break at his company.”

Worry narrowed Jada’s eyes, like she could feel the bad ending coming. My heart clenched tighter too, because I already knew how it ended and the mess I was in right now.

“It was a big job, cleaning for his company,” I said, “So I had to bring on help to cover the houses I was cleaning. I hired girls I’d met in the dorms to help with the houses. My roommate was really struggling at the time, depressed. She hardly got out of bed for weeks and was missing all of her classes. When she asked if she could work for me too, I was so excited that my company could help her out of her funk.

“I thought if she had a job, she might feel the same purpose I’d been given when what she really needed was counseling and probably medication too.” I swallowed down the lump in my throat so I could continue. “I had her come to work with me so I could keep an eye on her and make sure things were going well. The two of us worked full-time cleaning this office building. It was probably a job for four or five people, but we were young and energetic. And I was making more money than I’d ever made in my life.”

I shook my head at the memory. “I dropped out of college and moved out of the dorms into my own apartment. I’d been so proud of myself, despite how disappointed my parents were. They told me I was wasting my life and it would all go south on me. I told them they were wrong.”

My eyes stung, and I blinked hard, needing to keep going or I’d close up and fail to get it out. Jada put her hand on my knee, and I put my hand over hers, borrowing her strength.