Page 19 of Kylie

Taking a deep breath, I paced the room a couple of times to calm down, then decided a shower was in order. After all, this was my routine. Every morning, I woke up, then, with Travis’s help, I got the kids up and moving. If it was the weekend, I tried to come up with something to entertain them with, and during the week, I would get them ready for daycare. After what had become a daily battle regarding who didn’t want to go, I would finally get them dropped off. Then, I would go to the resort to put in my eight hours. Most of those were spent working with one of Travis’s brothers because I sensed Travis didn’t want to be in the same room as me.

Which had made this past week, when we’d been stuck in the house, a complete hell. For both of us.

And then, when the day was over, I would reverse course, pick up the kids, bring them home. Dinner was generally whatever I could scrounge together in a few minutes with five kids underfoot. With each passing day, as our new normal set in, we were finding a routine that worked for us. Generally, Travis would come home in time to help with baths. Then, we would get the kids to bed before going our separate ways.

And every night, without fail, I would go to Travis because I couldn’t stand to go a single day without that connection. I knew it was painful for us both, being without Kylie, but I wasn’t willing to let go of what we’d worked so hard for. I wasn’t ready to lose everything, although, at times, I felt like I already had.

After stripping off my clothes, I got in the shower. As was the case every time I took a minute to breathe, the tears would come. Fortunately, I reserved that emotional unloading for when I was alone so as not to let the kids see the pain that still consumed me. It was hard enough to get through the minutes of the day. It would be even harder if the kids had to shoulder the weight of everyone else’s emotions.

Once I'd let the hot water beat out some of the tension in my shoulders, I focused on my frustration rather than my grief, avoiding the tears as I hurried through the shower and got out. I pulled on sweatpants and a T-shirt—always clothed in case the kids needed me—then fell into bed, not bothering to pull back the covers.

It wasn’t until I was lying there in the dark room that I heard movement on the other side of the bedroom door.

I waited, expecting to see Kade or Avery peek inside as they had done a few times in recent weeks, seeking comfort.

But no one opened the door.

Was it…?

“Travis?”

The throat that cleared from the hallway was definitely that of a full-grown man.

I hated that my chest inflated, hope filling me. I knew the only reason he would come to our room would be to hash out whatever was on his mind. And clearly he felt it was important. Otherwise, he would wait until morning.

I remained silent, waiting to see what Travis would do. After several minutes had passed, I sighed, disappointed. I'd hoped that he would’ve made the effort, would’ve⁠—

The doorknob turned, and Travis appeared, backlit by the butter-yellow glow from the light in the hallway.

Neither of us said a word when Travis stepped into the room, closed the door behind him.

Neither of us said a word when Travis walked toward me, only to stop and turn back around.

I wasn’t sure I was breathing as I waited, watching him as he gripped the doorknob as though leaving the room. Several heartbeats passed, and still, Travis was there.

“You should’ve told me.”

“Told you what?” I asked, playing dumb.

He let go of the knob, turned around. “You’ve been talkin’ to Reese.”

“And?”

“You’ve been up to speed on the case. Probably before I was.”

Yes, I had gotten some updates. But I didn’t figure it had been relevant to what was going on. Until Brantley and Reese actually found Juliet Prince, it was all moot. Or until the FBI tracked her down, it didn’t matter. Everyone knew she was out there somewhere. I didn’t see the point in discussing it.

“You should’ve told me,” Travis repeated, his voice harsher than before.

“What good would it’ve done?” I countered. “How the fuck would it help? Tell me that, Travis. Tell me how knowin’ what they’re doin’ would help any of us get through another day.”

As I expected, he didn’t answer.

And yet, I still waited for a response.

Travis

I had never hyperventilated a day in my life.