Page 108 of Drowning in Darkness

“Or worse, no one else knows where she is, and her final days are long and painful because while there is no one coming to torture her, there’s also no one coming to save her.”

“So we need that location.”

“We do.”

“I don’t like it.”

“That makes two of us.”

“But...”

“But...”

Fuck.

THIRTY-SIX

STEPHANIE

Baring one’s soul is the greatest vulnerability.

I feel him long before I see him.

I curl the thick blanket around me closer and stare at the stunning stars appearing before my eyes as the sun loses its age-old battle with the moon.

A steaming mug appears in front of my face, and the tantalizing mix of chocolate and oranges swirls in the air. I grab it with a smile. He’s even put whipped cream and dark chocolate shavings on top. I take a sip and groan. It’s divine.

“If all else fails, you can have a life as a barista, making hot chocolate that’s like an orgasm in a mug.”

He snorts and drops into the chair beside mine. The fact that he’s got an identical mug is cute. For some reason, seeing a grown man who is capable of murdering with his bare hands cradle an over-the-top hot chocolate is doing more for my hyped-up hormones than if he’d decided to perform a one-man Magic Mike act for my eyes only.

“I’ll add that to my résumé,” he says as he tips his head back to stare at the night sky. “It’s so peaceful out here.”

“I agree.”

We sit for a few minutes in silence as we sip our drinks and bask in the calm.

“Do you believe in God?” I wonder.

“That’s a complex question for a boy brought up under the rule of a man who twisted religion in order to control and punish, and who built a warped world that satisfied his sick fantasies and need for power.”

I can’t imagine everything he’s experienced. It’s terrifying.

“Do you?” he asks.

My lips curve. “I believe in a higher power. Does one religion fit? Not that I’ve found yet.” I sigh. “But there are too many things in this world that show the hands of design instead of coincidence not to contemplate another force at work.”

“It’s weird that I’m jealous of those who find comfort in prayer and the notion that everything happens for a reason,” he says. “I can’t get behind that when I’ve seen so many acts of horror enacted without any other reason than to serve the sickness that thrives in pain.”

“Maybe it’s to build warriors to combat it on a larger scale.”

“Too much suffering.”

I can hear the pain in his words, practically taste it, and it’s the first time he’s started to open up about his world. The one not out here on a mountain with scatterings of snow. It gives me the courage to share my own horrors.

“When I left for college, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to major in. There are too many things to learn, to absorb. I love learning, whether it be a musical instrument, the inner workings of the classics, or the real-world application of decision mathematics.”

“What is decision mathematics?”