Page 108 of Found in Wild Sage

Her eyes find mine.

“Please go rest. I’m good here.”

She smiles. “I know.”

And when she goes, it settles in my bones.

No more restlessness. No more searching. No more hoping.

I’m good here.

CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE

Evie

Four days later, Dec is settled at home.

We’ve had a constant stream of visitors and the fridge and freezer are packed to bursting with food from family and friends. The owner of HoneyBun brought fresh bread, and tonight, The Pizza Shop sent dinner for every member of the Ryan family, all of whom were crammed into our house.

I worried it would overwhelm Dec, but he refused to let me kick them out. He sat quietly and seemed to simply soak it in. A few hours later, everyone has left. Mac said his goodbyes and will be on a flight back to North Carolina tonight, but he promised he’d be back soon. I hope he means it, for everyone’s sakes.

Grant helped me walk Dec up the stairs before he and Sam left. He’s still a little unsteady, and the stairs are a fairly big challenge for a man recovering like he is.

The house is quiet and I feel incredibly relieved to have my husband home. Though there is one thought inching its way in after days of holding it at bay.

“Will you tell me what’s on your mind, or do you need more time?”

He asks this from where he’s resting in the bed. I honestly thought he’d be asleep the minute his head hit the pillow, but he seems quite awake.

“I’m just tidying up.” I toss the clothes I helped him change out of into the laundry basket and pace toward him. “I’m so glad you’re home.” I kiss his forehead, then his lips.

He brings a hand to my face and my eyes shift at the contact. I haven’t gotten to touch him or be touched by him in what feels like forever. Now that I’ve had that closeness, I’m desperate for it. Just these simple, intimate moments are rare and I relish them when they happen.

“Me, too.” His blue eyes search back and forth between mine. “Now tell me.”

I lean back, caught out. I don’t want to hit him with my issues now, in the wake of everything he’s been through. But it’s also time. There is no better time than right now.

With a labored swallow, I perch on the bed next to him. He takes my hand in his, forging the connection I need right now.

“So…”

A smile flickers across his face. Even unshaven and hair a touch askew from getting dressed for bed, he’s incredibly handsome. He’s had his glasses on since the surgery and I can’t deny seeing him undone like this makes my heart flutter. He’s been through so much, but he’s so strong and kind and wonderful.

“So?” His head tips to one side in concern.

“There’s no way Trevor will ever get custody now. Not after admitting his mom told him what she wanted to do, even if he claims he didn’t believe she’d do it.”

That was one shocking revelation—not that Katrina had ranted about coming to take Charlie for herself, but that Trevor had cooperated so completely with helping find her and therefore me and Charlie.

And maybe more than that, that he’d said he was sorry. Not directly to me, but he’d apparently apologized profusely to Diego and Grant, when he spoke to them, begging them to tell me as much.

Nice thought. Really, it is. Is it enough for me to want him in our lives? No. But I suspect he was never the driver of the custody battle. It was always Katrina, who’ll be in jail or a psychiatric ward for a long, long time. That’s up to the judge at her hearing in a few weeks, and for now, she’s back in California at an institution. I’m working on forgiving her, but I’m not sure I’m there yet. Not while I still have to help my husband put his shirt on or catch him wincing when he laughs and forgets to brace ahead of time.

“True. That’s case closed.” He brushes a thumb over the back of my hand.

I clear my throat, tightness there keeping me from spitting it out.

Or, you know, the way my heartbeat pounds in my ears and I feel low-key nauseated by what I’m about to say.