Page 159 of The Crown’s Temptation

"He was visiting the Baron's estate?"

"So it has been said."

I thought about that. A man standing outside a life he was meant to destroy, watching it, deciding something privately that nobody had asked him to decide.

"At some point," Eravic said, "he decided he was not going to do it. That keeping those wards sealed mattered more than retrieving his mother." His voice dropped. "That you mattered more."

Neither of us said anything.

"But the wards have been getting looser," I said.

"Yes. For years. Whatever was always meant to seal them permanently has not happened. And the longer it does not happen the more vulnerable everything becomes."

"So it did not matter what Teorin decided."

He was quiet. "It mattered to him," he said. "Whatever it cost him to make that choice, it was real."

I looked at him across the fire. The lamp was low. Outside the dark water moved.

"You sound almost sympathetic," I said.

"I am almost sympathetic."

"To Teorin."

"To anyone," he said quietly, "who wants something they cannot have and decides to protect it anyway."

The fire crackled once.

I looked at him and he looked back and neither of us said the thing sitting in the space between the words we had just said.

"It is a lot to carry," I said.

"Yes," he said. "It is."

Neither of us reached for the cards again.

His eyes moved to the empty vial on the table.

"There is something else we need to discuss."

I looked at him.

"The treatments are helping," he said carefully. "But they are not stopping what is happening."

I looked away. "I know."

"Elsan is trying to find something else. A strong treatment, perhaps. Another treatment. We are all searching everywhere for the antidote but there has never been known to be one for this. But I need you to understand something, princess." He paused. “There may not be one.”

The words sat heavily between us.

"There may be another option."

I looked back at him.

"The Arrolyn. It can be activated,” he said. “It is not ideal. But it would restore what was missing. It would give you the power you need."

“Why is it not ideal, Eravic?” My voice was tight. “What is the cost?”