Page 55 of Apparently, I’m Torture

I put my hands on my hips. He was joking, I knew he was, but I wasn’t going to be swayed that easily. For once, Trevor was right about something. Shawn had five years to account for.

“So not only are you looking at my ass, but I’m ‘Miss Fares’ again?”

He lifted a shoulder, laughter gone, but his smile was still there. Ignoring the comment about my ass, he said, “You could go back to being Miss Fares, if that’s what you want.”

I dropped my arms by my side and stepped close. I needed to know why he blocked me out for so long. He owed me that much.

“What I want is to know why you ended things the way you did. I thought we were closer than that.”

His gaze lifted, flickering back to the doorway as if Stacey or Mia could appear any second. “If we were so close, why don’t I have a clue about what’s going on between those two?”

“Stacey and Mia?” I asked, absently wiping more cream from my blouse. He nodded as his eyes followed my fingers. “Mia never really got over what Stacey did to me back then.”

He shook his head. “That’s the part I’m not getting. What did Stacey do?”

I folded my arms and shifted on my feet, wondering at the damage I could do if I told Shawn the entire truth.

“Lilly?” he prompted, and I gave in.

“Remember our last few months before graduation?”

He put his hands in his pockets and nodded.

“Well, Stacey was upset that you didn’t want to date her, and when my original favor to set you up fell through, she was pretty angry with me, which… really stressed me out.”

“I remember that part.”

“Oh. I thought I hid it well.”

A small laugh filtered from him and I bumped my hip against his, grateful at how easy it was to slip into this.

“The last thing you were good at was hiding how you felt.”

“I guess that’s true. Anyway. Years ago, I failed some tests–you know I’ve always been bad at taking exams–and it brought my grade average down. Stacey and the other officers had a strict rule about kicking out Kappas who couldn’t keep their results up, and she held it over my head. And you know what being in that sorority meant to me. My mom was a Kappa. So, to stay, I was forced into helping other sisters with their work. I had to take over the merchandising because no one else wanted to do it, and I had to date Trevor because he was Stacey’s cousin–”

“Wait,” Shawn interrupted. “Stacey forced you to date Trevor?” I nodded and his jaw clenched. “Why would she do that?”

I shrugged. I was never sure of the details. All I knew was Trevor had a crush on me years ago, and asked his cousin to make something happen between us. I wasn’t attracted to Trevor, but I wasn’t dating anyone. At the time, I thought it was harmless. It kept me in Kappa Delta, and in Stacey’s good graces. If only I knew then what I knew now.

Shawn’s gaze searched mine. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You were so protective of me back then. If I said anything, you would’ve confronted her, and I could only see that making things worse.”

His hand found his hair and ran through it. My knees weakened.

Nurgh, hold it together, Lilly.

“I… might’ve,” he admitted. “If there wasn’t another way around it.”

“And I didn’t want you to do that.” I sighed and leaned against the table. “I made the mess; I had to dig myself out of it. And I tried to make things work with Trevor, but there just wasn’t any… chemistry, I guess. Not like there must be between you and Stacey. I mean, I knew she was your type, even back then. Which I guess is obvious, considering you two are dating–”

“We’re not dating, Lilly.”

I looked up and absorbed the confusion on his face. “You’re not?”

“We’ve never dated. Stacey and I don’t see each other that way.”

I was thrown by that. “Why not?”