Page 58 of Apparently, I’m Torture

And… Okay. I couldn’t let this slide.

“Lil… what is that?”

“What?” she asked, looking around the room.

I shut the textbook and dropped it on the ground. “That. That pink and blue thing you’re wearing. What is that?”

She looked down at her sweater and shrugged. “What? You squirted sauce on my cardigan.”

Okay yes, I squirted sauce on her cardigan earlier today. And as she squealed and snatched the squeeze bottle from my hands, I told myself I was getting us back to the old, comfortable footing of our goofy-but-solid friendship before we had to lock ourselves into close quarters together. I ignored the voice in the back of my head that told me I only did it because I wanted one less layer on her body.

But for her to replace that shapeless eyesore with this? Now this was something I couldn’t tolerate. I had to tease her. There was no other choice.

“But Lil, what’re you doing wearing that?”

She gripped the hem of her pink sweater and pulled it tight, inviting me to get a better look. There was a picture plastered across her chest: a blue pony with a rainbow mane galloping across a white cloud, and it was so Lilly that it made me want to throw the textbooks away and pull her close.

“What’s wrong, Shawn? Does Rainbow Dash’s awesomeness offend you?”

She rose to her knees, shuffled closer, and wiggled her sweater in my face.

I bit back a smile. “That sweater doesn’t belong to you; it belongs to a five-year-old with a doll collecting obsession.”

She feigned a gasp. “How dare you. My Little Pony is an institution.”

“It’s a ridiculous money-grab for kids.”

She put her hands on her hips. “No, it’s magical and amazing, and I know you love it.”

My brows raised as she waved her sweater in my face again before taking on Rainbow Dash’s husky cartoonish voice. “I’m awesome, it’s a warnin’, watch out for me, I’m as awesome as I oughta be.”

I smiled as she rocked back on her heels. “Hey, look, I got one. I almost forgot what that looked like on you.”

Then she collapsed onto a couch cushion and stretched as I asked, “What what looks like?”

“Your smile. You’ve been so grumpy lately. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile in weeks.”

I frowned. “I sure as hell got a laugh out of spilling sauce on you earlier today.”

She shot up and glared at me. “I knew that wasn’t an accident.”

I smiled and raised my hands. “I did you a favor, trust me. That cardigan was so old, even Uncle Henry would’ve thrown it out by now.”

A laugh burst from her and she leaned back again, relaxing into the cushions.

We were both quiet for a while, and I listened to the whirring of the heaters as I thought over all the times Lilly made me smile. I tallied them up as she shut her eyes and let out a breath. The lack of sound between us was the kind of quiet that was comfortable. And after all the torture I’d been putting myself through, all the torture that wanting her put me through, this intimate silence was a welcome change of pace.

Lilly was never good at maintaining silence though. “Did you know fish can get seasick?”

An incredulous laugh burst out of me as she shrugged deeper into the cushions.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you that for days.”

“Oh yeah? Did you know male monkeys bald the same way men do?” I asked, and I could tell I’d surprised her by her sudden huff of laughter.

She spoke to the ceiling. “No way, I didn’t know that one. Well, that kind of makes sense. Maybe men are evolved from monkeys.”

I narrowed my eyes at her. “It’s… scientifically proven that we are, Lil.”