Page 64 of Apparently, I’m Torture

“Yes. I’ve had to be at every other pickup.”

We stared at each other, locked in a weird tableau. We both knew what was going on here. He didn’t want to spend time alone with me if he could help it.

He broke first, searching my face and giving me a stiff nod. “Okay. Be ready at seven tomorrow morning. I’ll pick you up and we’ll go from there.”

He turned to leave as I squeaked, “Seven in the morning?”

When he didn’t answer, I stood and raised my voice. “All the other orders were scheduled for the afternoon.”

He didn’t slow. Instead, he looked over his shoulder and said, “Well, I’m busy, Miss Fares. Consider it a necessary evil.”

Ugh. Stuck in a truck at an ungodly hour with Shawn Jackson. Damn.

Thursday Morning

Outside Lilly’s Apartment

Lilly

I stumbled out of my apartment, wearing a tight pencil skirt and purple blouse while clutching one of my reusable to-go cups. It had a picture of Ursula, my favorite cartoon villain, and a quote that read, ‘You poor uncaffeinated soul’, which was exactly how I felt this morning. Poor and uncaffeinated.

Grasping my cup and handbag, I made my way to the curb, and looked for Shawn. He was already there. I grunted as I picked up the pace. Damn him. I should’ve known he’d be here early. He was always early.

He stood on the sidewalk, wearing a cotton V-neck tee and grey jeans, and he opened the passenger door once I came into view. Even when we weren’t on the best of terms, he was still as reliable as ever. He offered me a soft, “Good morning,” as he held out his hand.

And I was as stubborn as ever. I ignored his offer of help and maneuvered my own way into the truck–which was not meant for anyone below the height of five foot eight–and sat with a sigh.

Shawn climbed in without a word or a glance, and I was fine with that. We drove in silence for most of the way, until I finally gave in.

“Why did you cut me out, Shawn?”

The warehouse was a few more miles along the road, but we were stuck in traffic, and he was trapped with me inside a big steel rectangle with wheels. This time, he’d have to talk it out with me.

“Lilly, I don’t want to go over this.” Or not.

“Oh, come on. I’ve spent an entire five weeks playing by your rules. The least you could do is talk to me about it.”

He shook his head. “Déjà vu.”

“This whole thing is déjà vu,” I muttered.

He let out a sigh. “It was years ago.”

“So?”

“So, why does it matter now?”

A frustrated growl rumbled in my throat. “It matters because you meant a lot to me. We were so close, and it hurt when you ended things. It felt like I never really mattered to you.”

His voice was soft, but harsh. “You mattered.”

I scoffed. “I doubt it. If I meant anything to you, you’d tell me what I did to make you want to cut me out of your life for so long.”

He sighed, as if he was trying to decide on what to say. But, for all my pushing, I wasn’t ready for what he said next. “I think it’s pretty clear I was… attracted to you back then.”

My laugh was incredulous. “Clear? It was not clear, Shawn.”

His glance slid to me, then it was back on the road before I could blink. “Trying to kiss you in the backroom while we were supposed to be studying for your final exam wasn’t clear enough?”