Page 74 of Apparently, I’m A B!tch

Chapter38

Nikki

Tuesday

I had an R&Bmix playing in my office as I worked. Mary J. Blige was reminding me that I was just fine as her impressive pipes sang the lyrics to one of my favorite songs.

No time for bad vibes, are you joking?

Yep. No time for bad vibes, no time for the way loneliness clutched at my chest, and no time for thoughts about Tristan. I had a case to win.

I looked up from my desk and flicked through the manila folders and stacks of tapes, looking for the exact report the prosecution filed against my client. It should’ve been here, but it wasn’t.

Then I remembered I asked Kelly to make copies so we could highlight every detail anew as we watched the security tapes from the scene of the crime. She said she’d be right back, promising a bowl of popcorn from hers and Harvey’s secret stash.

The inquisitiveness in me wanted to know more about this hoard of junk food, but I didn’t pry. Mama made me so much baklava, I had no reason to go to Extra Shot, and no reason to steal anyone else’s snacks. But when Kelly didn’t come back twenty minutes later, I decided to check on her.

I paused the music and left my office, meaning to check the kitchen first, but Kelly’s raised-yet-muffled voice made me stop and look at Harvey’s closed door.

Searching the alleyway, I watched the administration team bustle along as they usually did, not paying me any attention, and edged quietly toward Harvey’s office.

I bit my lip, knowing I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t resist reaching out a finger. Softly, I braced it against the edge of the door handle. One little small but sure flick, and it would open just a crack.

I hesitated. What kind of lawyer was I? Snooping and sneaking around, trying to eavesdrop on conversations? I pulled my finger away. Nope. I would not stoop that low.

Maggie was right. Whatever was between Harvey and Kelly was none of my business.

I was about to go back to my office when the door opened just a crack, and I recognized a sliver of Kelly on the other side. She was yelling at Harvey, and about to storm out, but his raised voice made her stay.

I caught the tail end as he said, “I can’t, Kelly. My hands are tied. Partners can’t date their paralegals.”

“Oh, you are such a snake, Harvey Lenin! I can’t believe I was stupid enough to believe you for as long as I did. How many times did you promise that once we won a case, you’d take me out to celebrate?”

“But I did! We went out for lunch right after our last case together.”

“You took me out for lunch because Nikki told you to. And that wasn’t a damn date! You made me think we were finally getting somewhere.”

He lowered his voice and I was frozen to the spot, knowing that any second, Kelly could turn and see me standing there.

“Kelly, we were somewhere. Don’t you remember all those nights together? Right here in my office? Can’t those be good enough? Why do we have to complicate things with dating?”

Where he was quiet, she was loud. “Because I’m not a whore you asshole! I deserve the whole thing. I deserve to be wanted by a man who isn’t ashamed to be with me because I’m a paralegal and not a damn associate!”

“But I do want you. And when Nikki loses this bet, things will go back to normal.”

“I know what you want from me, and it’s not enough. Not anymore. And Nikki’s not losing this case. She’s going to win this. Even if she didn’t, there’s no way in hell I’d ever come back to work for you.”

I twisted and hurried to my door, but Kelly turned back, leaving Harvey’s room in a rush, and lifted her eyes to lock onto mine.

She paused, and for a handful of charged seconds we stared at one another, recognition flitting between the two of us. She knew I heard every word. I knew she was broken at hearing the truth.

That’s what the truth was. It was blunt yet sharp, cutting yet indifferent. I could see the pain it caused her to see Harvey’s actions for what they were. It echoed my own shattered ideals of who I thought Tristan was, the trust between us now a forgotten memory. The loss, the grief of it, was only something the truth could uncover.

But, despite the hurt it caused, it was better to build a life based on what was real than to live one blinded by pretty lies. Kelly would see that.

She dropped her shoulders and her bottom lip wavered. I let go of my door and opened my arms.

Her face crumpled as she stepped into my embrace. “You were right, you were right. I’ve been so stupid.”