Page 60 of My Girlfriend is Not the Father

‘Oh! I call this the second trimester honeymoon. It’s this incredible space where your body finally accepts whatever foreign stuff is happening and floods you with a burst of energy. Enjoy it. It won’t last.’

Lucy bit her lip. She still had so many questions about all things pregnancy, but the one time she went down a Google pregnancy rabbit hole, she got terrified and emotional and vowed never to look up any symptoms again. ‘Can I ask you a personal question?’

Pamela clutched the folder against her chest. ‘Of course.’

Lucy stood, moved to the side and rubbed her belly. ‘Is this normal?’ She’d put on close to fifteen pounds by now, and every single pound seemed to have gone straight to her belly, instead of evenly spreading out across her body like she’d experienced in the past when gaining or losing weight. Interestingly enough, she loved her body. She had no idea how sexy she’d feel in her skin while pregnant. ‘I’m not even halfway through this thing and I’m so not one of those “did she eat a burger” or “is she bloated”. I am legit in the “there’s a baby up in there” stage.’

‘Well, yes, you do look pregnant. But it’s so hard to say what’s normal.’ Pamela tapped the folder against the doorway. ‘Did I ever tell you my sister-in-law didn’t even know she was pregnant for almost six months?’

‘Wait, what? How is that even possible?’

‘Well, she’d always had irregular periods. She wasn’t showing at all and only gained like ten pounds. Hell, I’ve gained ten pounds in a few months before.’ Pamela chuckled. ‘It was the shock of a lifetime. So really, I’m not sure if there is a norm. What I do know is that you look amazing. Pregnancy suits you.’

Lucy rubbed her belly. ‘It’s pretty cool, right? I have a newfound respect for the female body.’ She withheld adding a dirty comment about always loving the female body.

‘Just take it easy, and make sure you’re taking care of yourself. Let me know if anything gets too stressful around here, okay?’ Pamela flickered her fingers in a wave and Lucy returned to the computer.

Four thousand trips to the bathroom later, Lucy glanced at the clock. Half an hour of work left for the day and she’d be busting out of here. She logged back into her laptop and started to answer an email when her phone buzzed.

Jade: Can you call me? I have something amazing to tell you!

Lucy shut her office door and dialled. ‘Oooh, tell me everything.’

‘You are never going to believe this.’ Jade’s normally even-keel voice was rushed and excited. ‘I just got a call from the Minneapolis Times.’

‘A good call?’ Lucy lowered herself back into her chair. ‘Or like, hey there, we’re investigating the murder that took place in your basement fifty years ago.’

Jade chuckled. ‘Yes! A great call. You know how every year they do the “best of” articles? Like, the best Greater Twin Cities restaurants, bars, bookstores …’

Lucy grinned at the infectious energy in Jade’s voice. ‘Yes …’

‘I was nominated for Best Salon!’

‘Oh my God, what?’ Lucy squealed, then covered her mouth. ‘You’ve only been open for like two years.’

‘I know! I’m freaking out. They’re going to do a full article on me and the other top three nominees, with pictures and everything.’ Jade’s breathless voice sounded through the receiver. ‘And get this. They’re having a banquet, and I’m invited as a guest of honour.’

‘Like all white linens and fancy-pants people speaking in British tones and too many forks?’

‘Well, the British accent is a no, but everything else yes. I’m already thinking about what to wear. Flats are a good choice, right? I mean, for the record, I can rock the shit out of heels. I just don’t want to walk in all six-three and tower over everyone.’

‘You mean like a goddess? Come on, you should wear heels and show off those spectacular legs.’ Lucy grinned. ‘I’m going to vampire-style devour your legs.’

‘Um, okay.’

‘Not sexy huh? It was a solid try, though, right? ‘A’ for effort.’ Lucy tapped her fingers on the desk. ‘How about I’m going to eat through you like a filet mignon?’

‘Getting worse.’

‘I am going to lick you like a stick of butter.’

‘Who licks a stick of butter? You know what, never mind. I don’t think I can look at you the same if you say you do.’

Man, was Lucy happy for her girlfriend. This was the win Jade needed. She’d been so down lately, ever since she fired her employee last month. Jade had talked about it a little, with a quiver in her voice when she uttered the word ‘betrayed’, but she always refocused the conversation back to Lucy.

‘This is amazing.’ Lucy logged off the computer. ‘When are they sending the photographer? What are you going to wear? What will you say?’

Jade’s voice was breathy. ‘So many details. They’re sending over a confirmation tomorrow but sounds like the journalist will come in about two weeks, and the banquet will be in May. I’m so flipping giddy right now.’