Page 51 of Cursing My Cheating Husband

“There’s an announcement about it in the conference room. We have to get over there,” Ryder explained.

My heart rate immediately sped up. If it was one of the higher-ups, who knew who would be brought in to fill the void and how that might change the dynamic here. With everything else I had going on, I had no energy left to navigate shifting office politics. I needed this job to stay on coast mode as much as possible while everything else about my life was on fire.

A moment later, it occurred to me that this reaction was probably another example of my awfulness. I’d just been told someone had died, and my only thoughts were how this might affect me. Something else to bring to the therapist, I guess.

I jumped up and hustled down the hall with Duke and Ryder, but as soon as we arrived at the conference room, my back went tense. Something was up.

The only employees here were our extended crew. The other guys (and handful of women) in the office who were around our age and level.

And every fucking one of them was smirking and snickering, which only got louder when I arrived.

At the front of the room was some kind of poster board or painting on an easel, covered with a black sheet.

“I don’t have time for whatever bullshit this is,” I snarled.

I turned to exit, but Ryder blocked the door as Duke moved to the front of the room.

“Calm down, Mad Dog. We’ve all gathered to grieve together.” At that, Duke whipped the sheet off the easel.

Revealing that beneath it was a black poster board with a giant illustration of a grave! And written on the headstone: “In Memoriam: Mad Dog’s Hard-Ons.”

The entire room burst into hysterical, deafening laughter. “We heard about the curse on your dick,” giddy Duke yelled, projecting to be heard above the roaring shrieks of glee.

The sensation of being so completely exposed… I was dizzy. My neck snapped around as I took in who was here. If you made a list of all the people I most wanted to keep this news from, every one of them was present. All the guys who would absolutely never allow me to live this down. Veins popped on my forehead and sweat poured down my back as I charged to the front of the room. “You motherfuckers!” I roared.

I grabbed the poster board and ripped it in half⁠—

When I was stopped by an icy female voice from the back of the room. “Put that down.”

I hadn’t noticed her in the corner, but Callie now stepped forward, looking as gorgeous as I’d ever seen her. She wore a skintight crimson dress that emphasized the lusciousness of every curve, with a plunging neckline that instantly seized the eye of every man in the room.

Magic sparkled on her fingertips as she gestured my way, and the ripped poster board immediately mended itself and levitated back onto the easel.

“Duke, Ryder, and I took a lot of care in putting that together. Have some respect,” she said.

The assembled crowd laughed even louder.

“I didn’t even know you talked to each other?” I stammered stupidly. As far as I knew, Callie had only chatted with Duke and Ryder in passing at the office Christmas parties.

“They reached out after you confessed to them about cheating on me. To offer their sympathy and apologies,” Callie chuckled.

“And to let her know we’re on her side,” Ryder said.

“And think she can do so much better,” Duke rushed to add.

“It was very sweet of you boys,” Callie cooed.

As I struggled to process, the room became a cacophony of everyone yelling nasty jokes at me.

“Aww, look at his face! Let’s call him Sad Dog now.”

“Looks like your job performance isn’t the only limp thing about you!”

“This is not appropriate workplace behavior,” I protested pathetically.

“Hey, don’t try to tell us what’s appropriate,” Duke said.

Ryder slapped me on the back. “Yeah, this gathering is HR-approved.”