Page 81 of Can’t Say No

My publicist, Remi, meets me in my dressing room with a wide, fake grin on her face.

“Nice work out there, kid.”

“Bullshit. You sure you were watching my rehearsal and not Molly Jo’s?” I grumble, wiping sweat off my face with a towel. “Remi, this is such a disaster. I don’t know why I thought headlining The Valley after months off was a good idea. I can’t wait to see what the media has to say about this.”

I dramatically plop down onto one of the lounge chairs in my dressing room.

Remi nods thoughtfully, brows creasing to highlight the wrinkles I have probably caused over the years.

“Ah, I see. And how do you feel about that?”

I roll my eyes and scoff. “Who are you, my therapist?”

Remi laughs, “No. I was trying to be a friend, but nevermind.”

I point a finger at her. “Can’t be my friend if you’re on payroll.”

“So that leaves you with a grand total of… zero friends?”

“I’ve got Matty,” I counter.

“Who pulls a paycheck for running your socials,” Remi fires back.

Fuck. She's right.

“I have other friends back home,” I mumble out, the word home catching in my throat. Now that I’ve blown everything up with Connor, I don’t think I can ever call Ridgecrest my home again.

Someone from wardrobe pops their head into the room to drop off my outfit, saving me from having to explain myself further.

“Thank you,” I say, taking in the sparkles and rhinestones adorning a very skimpy looking bodysuit. A far cry from the jeans and T-shirts I’ve grown accustomed to wearing in Ridgecrest. “And any chance y’all have a pair of shoes with a lower heel?”

I hold out the six inch stilettos that nearly did me in.

The wardrobe assistant winces, like my shoe preference is a personal insult, but dutifully takes the offending shoes.

Remi shakes her head. “I knew going back to your hometown would shake things up, but I didn’t realize you’d come back a completely different person. Shooing away a pair of Louboutins? Who are you, and what did you do with Delaney?”

I sink deeper into the plush armchair. “Same old me, Remi. I just don’t feel like performing on fucking stilts.”

But that’s a lie.

Returning to Ridgecrest changed me. It left a mark on me as permanent as a tattoo. Somewhere in the middle of crappy cups of coffee, making copies of sheet music, and corralling groups of high schoolers, I fell in love with life again.

Years of creeping apathy finally caught up with me, and now I can’t unsee how miserable I was. Going through the motions, pantomiming a life I thought would make me happy, when in reality, I hadn’t been happy in a long time.

Add in falling in love with Connor to the mix, and it’s safe to say I’ll never be the same again.

Remi crosses her arms and surveys the room. “You know, all these years, and I’ve never seen you eat those Lucky Charms.”

“Oh yeah,” I say absentmindedly, scrolling through my phone. “They’re not for me.”

“Okay, diva. Why do you insist on having them then? ”

"They're for Connor,” I say, still only half paying attention.

Remi scoots a folding chair near me and drops her hand to mine. “You’ve been keeping a snack in your dressing room for Connor, your childhood best friend, for a decade?”

I finally look up from my phone, sliding my hand out from under hers. “Um, yes?”