Page 85 of Can’t Say No

My ego is a bitch.

And, funnily enough, my ego was pretty damn quiet during those last few weeks in Ridgecrest.

Connor has a way of doing that, calming all the background noise and bringing my chaotic heart some clarity. I thought being back here in L.A. was the answer, but instead I’m questioning everything I’ve ever thought I wanted.

Am I really about to bend to my dad’s will again? Beg for forgiveness after finally, finally performing for myself? Shrink myself back down to a digestible size for the sake of my career?

Am I really going to walk away from the best thing that’s ever happened to me in pursuit of a dream that turned sour years ago?

Is this what I’m going to do forever? Pine after Connor like he’s, what did Remi say, my long-lost love?

Yeah, fuck that.

I push out of the tub and snatch my phone back. Dripping wet, I perch on the edge of the tub and pull up Connor’s contact, then pause. I nibble on my lip, trying to formulate a plan.

I dial Matty instead.

“Delaneyyyy!” He practically screams through the phone. “Are you coming out with us tonight?”

“Uh, no. I need your help.”

Loud music pulses in the background. “Work stuff? I’ve got some social posts cued up for the next few days. So come out and party! I’m sure everyone here will sign an NDA, right guys?”

I hear hooting and hollering in affirmation.

I pull my phone away from the shrieking. “Matty, no I need your help with Connor.”

“Connor? Didn’t his contract end?”

I rub my temples with my free hand. “Yeah, yeah it did, but that’s not what this is about Matty. I love him and I fucked it up. I need to make it right. Will you help me?”

There’s a long silence on the other end of the line, save for the raucous party noises in the background.

“Delaney, I don’t know what to tell you. If this isn’t a work thing, I really can’t help.” Matty hangs up and I’m left sitting naked, dripping wet, and somehow even more alone than I was five minutes ago.

For the first time in a decade, I’ve got nothing. No well-crafted PR move to fall back on, no social climbers willing to do anything for my attention. It’s just me and the consequences of my own actions.

I pull up one more contact and mutter a prayer that she’ll pick up.

“Hey, Remi,” I say, tears starting to fall. “Does that offer of friendship still stand?”

33

CONNOR

“Yo, Mr. Majors, you think Miss James is gonna come back?” Simon asks over the quiet typing of his classmates. “She didn’t, uh, she didn’t even tell us goodbye.”

Simon, loud, wild, strong Simon, looks like a kid again, eyes full of an innocent hope that I wish I didn’t have to squash.

Delaney’s sudden departure didn’t only hurt me. The choir kids were heartbroken as well. The whole school had grown attached to her presence. She was always singing in the hallways and greeting the kids by name. When Mrs. Crane didn’t need her, she’d bring all of us teachers coffee from the fancy machine she bought for the lounge, and I know she snuck extra treats to her choir girls, too.

She was such a bright light, yet somehow could never see her own glow. The eye of a tornado who didn’t realize the power that swirls around her. And her storm touched down in our little town and absolutely wrecked all of us.

“Don’t think so, Simon,” I say, doing all I can to keep the heartbreak out of my voice.

“What happened between y’all?” Simon asks. “Did she dump you?”

A few more heads pop up, abandoning their essays in favor of juicy drama.