Page 4 of Maleen

She takes a step toward me. “Talyn, what’s going on? Why are you doing this? Aemon says you think that what happened to… that what happened back at the cabin was your fault?”

There’s a frown marring her face like she doesn’t believe me, exhaustion slumping in her shoulders like she’s lost sleep over the fact I imprisoned myself.

My tongue tastes like ash as I go to speak, but I don’t look away. She doesn’t deserve a coward as her mate who won’t look at her while he confesses his sins. Even the ones I don’t fully understand.

I feel a slimy presence run along my mind, something I haven’t even noticed until recently. “I wanted to go to the mountains—”

“We all did. That isn’t on you.” She moves closer and Killian growls. She throws him a glare over her shoulder. “He won’t hurt me. He’s in fucking iron and I can handle myself.” She crosses her arms, tucking her wrists into the crook of her elbows as she turns her glare down to the metal that encircles my limbs.

He glares back, mimicking her pose, crossing his massive arms over his leatherbound chest. The many silver scars that cover his body shimmer like ice in the dim lighting.

I struggle to stand, my body sore from sitting on the rocky ground for so long. “It is on me. I wanted to go there, was drawn to go there even before the pixie delivered the news with a location. I see flashes of broken memories from when I was captured, things I... I know there’s something wrong, something controlling me. In a way I still have my own mind, but I can feel myself slipping, and since being back here it’s gotten worse. You are not safe with me, Ravina. Please listen to Killian. He can do what I can’t and make sure no harm comes to you.”

She shakes her head. “No, we can figure this out together. You don’t want to hurt me, otherwise you wouldn’t have done this.” She gestures to the prison cave kept under Aemon’s family home. “Please don’t shut me out again. I don’t know if what we were trying to build can survive that. Try. For me. For us. I know in my soul, in our bond—” She’s somehow gotten close enough that she lays her hand on my scarred stomach, right over my skin bearing our shredded bonding mark—“that you will never purposely hurt me.”

My breath hitches and she’s peering at me with heartbreaking hope. Her warm hand is a balm to the chill of the air. “Rav…”

“No,” her voice is firm as she peers up at me. “Let me help. I couldn’t save Mel. Let’s try to figure this out. What memories?”

“I have memories of a red stone, being tied to the bed where my father kept me… of him whispering things I can’t hear. He’s fucked with my mind,” I growl. “I just can’t figure it out.”

“Talyn!” Killian snaps and when I glance down at her my hand is around the nape of her neck but I can’t seem to let go. I need her. I need her closer to me.

“He’s fine. He’s not hurting me,” she reassures him. And me. “What did the red stone look like, Talyn?” Her voice is etched with fear, but somehow I know it’s not directed at me.

“Like a thick chunk of uncut glass shimmering in the candlelight, its color as deep as scarlet blood,” I whisper, glancing down at her. It would be so easy to break her neck right now. Break it and get myself back. Just complete the task father gave you…

I fling myself away from her, the cave wall biting into my back as my voice cracks. “You need to leave, Ravina. Please.” I desperately try to blink away the thought of killing my mate as bile builds in the back of my throat. A shiver crawls down my spine but the whisper thoughts inside my head keep going—thoughts that can’t possibly be mine. How did I never notice this before? Was I so wrapped up in my own anger that I couldn’t tell these thoughts from my own?

She takes a step toward me, her face layered in betrayal and hurt, but Killian pulls her out of my reach. So I do the only thing I can think of to make this better for her and I drop to my knees, the chains clinking as they hit the stone and the pain of the iron burning into me.

“I swore after I found out about my father that I would never kneel to him or anyone who thought they could rule this realm. But I’m kneeling for you. You are my mate and my Queen, but not like this. I will not serve you until I’m fixed or I’m dead. You have always been my safe place as Maeven, but as Ravina, you have my heart. I need you to leave me here. I will be okay, but you will not be if you stay.” The admission pours out of my mouth, things I never even admitted to myself, but it’s out there and I can’t take it back. Hardened male I am, soothed by this soft female before me, I grieve and my heart cracks at seeing tears run down her face. The crack solidifies at the jarring sound of the cell door slamming shut as Killian hauls her to safety, leaving me alone to my own thoughts and the haunting sight of her crying.

CHAPTER THREE

THE ECHOING OF TALYN'S CELL door lingers in my ears as I stare at the entrance to the dungeon. The fear I feel for him is nauseating. What he described was the Soul Stone. If the Soul Stone is manipulating his mind to do his fathers bidding, does that mean Craven is doing it to the others too? To the Dragons?

“Fuck, breathe Ravina,” Killian growls, dropping to his knees in front of me, making him almost my height. “We will figure it out and get him safe. Aemon’s going to come talk to him in the morning, but it’s been a long, hard flight and you need rest. You’re exhausted, Little Warrior,” he rumbles. He’s not touching me, but he’s close enough that the heat radiating off his body makes me want to sink into his hold and soak up his comfort.

I suck in a breath. “Can I hug you?” He nods, and his touch is exactly what I need right now, but I know this is all he’s willing to give me, so I’ll take it. “I’m sorry for yelling at you, I just—”

“You needed to see your asshole mate with your own eyes.”

I nod against his shoulder and whisper the thought that I fear might be true. “I think his father used the Soul Stone on him.”

He squeezes me tightly. “Fuck. We should go tell the others.” He lets me go and then rises back to his towering height.

Taking a deep breath, I nod before squaring my shoulders and composing myself. I haven’t felt like myself since everything that happened at the cabin. I haven’t wanted to speak about it, either. My friends and I have been taking comfort in each other whenever we weren’t riding our beasts. Either that, or I was curled up with Jesper or Aemon, letting them comfort me. The only place I feel okay with being vulnerable is in their arms. They make it feel okay to not have to be strong every second of the day, but even so, we haven’t talked about the guest who is now staying here, recovering. And I haven’t asked. I don’t even think it’s real. I know I’m going to have to face her sooner rather than later, but I thought she was dead, and I have so many questions.

The sounds of our soft breaths and boots against the stone steps leading back up into the main part of the castle is oddly comforting. Killian has always been my quiet comfort—someone I can lean on without having to talk things out. The fact that he is still like that after all these years clicks another piece of normalcy into place—even if my ‘normal’ now is missing a key part of my family.

I remember losing Gretchen when I was younger. The grief of being alone was almost unbearable. This time feels different because I’m not alone; in fact, this is the least I’ve been alone in my entire life—but sometimes it feels like I’m in a bubble, and I can hear people talking but it’s like I can’t make out the words.

Just as we reach the top of the stairs Killian collapses. “Jesper! You fucking mangey beast, knock it off!” he bellows as he flails around on the floor as if he’s falling.

Jesper’s laughter peels out of him as he clutches his belly. “Just keeping you on your toes. I can’t have my Queen’s protector neglecting his duties. I think you need to be a bit more vigilant. Think of this as Jesper’s Training one-oh-one.”

A small laugh leaves my lips as I reach into my well of magick and cancel out Jesper’s illusion. “Thank you, oh kind sir,” I tease. “But I fear that your training is unnecessary. I think I’m more than capable of protecting myself.” It takes me a second to realize I think that is the first joke I’ve made since everything happened.