Page 73 of Red, White, and BearCat Blue

My chest filled with pride as I smiled at him, leaning down to kiss him as he finished up. By the time he finally stepped back, my fingers were virtual prunes but even more important than that, I was absolutely certain I’d never be the same.

Chapter Twenty-One

CAM

After the incredible shower sex, Mars called room service and ordered food. My cheeseburger was fantastic, topped with roasted jalapenos and grilled onions, and slathered with a wonderful spread. The french fries were hot and crispy, and dipping them in ketchup sealed the deal for a great meal. Instead of ketchup, Mars had requested malt vinegar which sounded weird but he gave me one to taste.

“Go on then. Just ‘ave a go,” he teased.

But hell, it was good! I grinned, leaning forward to kiss him. Sharing food with him made me feel like I was cast as the lead in a sexy rom com. I couldn’t believe how happy he made me.

Mars groaned as he ate, practically inhaling the same burger I’d ordered, wiping the juices off with a napkin as I looked on with a smile I no longer tried to hide. I’d gone and done it…I’d fallen for the big man, surprised that it had taken such a short time to develop such huge feelings for Mars. I couldn’t put my finger on any one reason. Instead I examined a whole host of explanations for my feelings.

Though I couldn’t be sure, I thought Mars had big feelings for me too. Although he seemed loathe to voice them out loud, which kind of pissed me off. But his touches, the way he reached for me, the way I caught him looking when there was no reason to, told me more than if he’d said something.

I didn’t know why it had happened so fast for us. Maybe it was the close proximity we’d been forced into, but he hadn’t complained even though he’d said he didn’t do relationships. In the beginning, I’d slotted him into the player category because he’d certainly had that trait written all over him. Now, though, I was slightly baffled by how he behaved, seeming to want to be close, yet keeping himself at a distance all at the same time…at least in front of others.

We finished eating and crawled into bed, rolling to face each other in the fading afternoon light as the sun sank into the horizon beyond the windows. Mars folded one arm beneath his head on the pillow and set the other on my hip, covering the bruises left by his fingers. I’d woken the other day with the evidence on both hips from where he’d held me down as he’d sucked me off that first night. Now he’d completely taken possession of my body over the last few days. There’d no doubt be more. I wasn’t complaining. I loved the look of the marks he left on my skin, evidence that he’d had little control over himself when he thoroughly fucked me, like he’d shown in the shower less than an hour ago.

I smiled at him, reaching out to cup the side of his jaw. “You’re so beautiful, you know. I can’t stop staring at you.”

He smiled, sliding his hand up to my waist as he caressed me. The innocent gesture made butterflies flutter in my stomach. “No one’s ever put it like that before.”

“No one ever told you how beautiful you are?”

He shook his head. “Never like that. Men ‘ave told me I’m good looking, but I don’t normally ‘ook up with guys more than once. Telling a bloke you ‘ardly know ‘ow beautiful ‘e is, just isn’t done, Cam.”

I frowned. “You must have wanted to be with someone more than one time, no?”

He shook his head. “I never let it ‘appen.”

“Why?”

He sighed, flopping onto his back and staring at the ceiling. “My father wasn’t around when I was a lad.”

“Did your parents’ divorce?”

“They were never married. As soon as my mum told ‘im she was pregnant, ‘e upped sticks and left. Didn’t look back.”

I nodded. “You were raised by a single mom.”

“I was.” He sighed, looking back at the ceiling. I reached out and laid a hand on his chest, toying with the light sprinkling of hair that covered his muscles. “I suppose I grew up not trusting men as a result of ‘ow ‘e treated ‘er. She seemed to get along well without a man emotionally, but it was a financial struggle.” He glanced at me, reaching down to cover my hand with his and flattened it on his chest. “I know ya know ‘ow that is, Cam.”

I nodded. “We always struggled. I suppose it gave me an excuse to start stealing cars. I learned from my older brother, Jessie, and the more I practiced, the bigger the risks I took, always wanting to show off in front of him. It was stupid, especially since it eventually landed him in an adult prison after he got caught several times as a juvenile. When he was released from prison that final time, it was with an addiction to drugs. That addiction eventually killed him. I should’ve stopped stealing cars then, but instead, I just perfected my technique.”

“You were stubborn.”

I snorted. “Yeah, and look where that got me. Getting into bed with Josiah was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done and even though I’ve told myself that a million times, I never wanted to change things until I met you.”

“Why?”

I shrugged. “I’m not sure if you can tell, but I really really like you, Mars.” When he opened his mouth to say something, I held up my hand. “You don’t have to say anything. I don’t expect you to.” I waved a hand at the room, pointing between us. “I’ve always known this was temporary. I just want you to know that I don’t expect more.”

He smirked. “Ya gonna let me talk now?”

I felt my face heat. “I’m sorry. I tend to talk too much sometimes.”

“No, it’s not that. But if I were to say something, I’d say this…when a man is young, ‘e’s all gas, no brakes.”