Page 92 of The Duke’s Wager

“I have never seen him like this, Lucy. It is rather disconcerting, I must admit. He is like a man possessed. He hasn’t touched any of us, strangely… but he is mad.”

“Mad?”

Though she had always regarded her father as mad, this was new to hear from Maria, who had always been tactful when it came to Henry’s less admirable qualities.

“He’s broken almost everything in the house. He spent the night in a drunken stupor, shouting at everyone who dared approach him. We all tend to avoid him when he is like this, we have learned by now. But this… It is different, somehow. He’s always been violent, but never this destructive. He is like a storm – clearing everything in his path.”

Lucy closed her eyes at this and shook her head.

“I am truly sorry, Maria. I know this is because of me, and I put you all in danger through my carelessness.”

Maria shook her head and reached out, taking Lucy’s hands in hers. “Lucy, I need you to listen to me. We are afraid of what he might do. He keeps mumbling about cleaning up messes, about there not being another way, about…” She paused. “We are afraid. Not for our safety – we know that we do not matter to him. We are afraid for you.”

Lucy looked away and sighed deeply. How could she explain to the woman she loved like a mother that she was not afraid for her own safety? Her life and health had become irrelevant to her with the betrayal of the man who held her heart. Nothing mattered to her.

“I am going to sneak away and get help.”

Maria’s words shocked her, and she looked at the other woman with wide eyes. This, if she were caught, was nothing less than a suicide mission.

“Maria, you cannot possibly—”

“Hush!” Maria’s eyes were kind, caring, and she took both Lucy’s hands in hers once more.

“Lucy, I should have done this years ago. Alerted someone to what was going on in this house. I should have protected you better, and I failed you. But no more. I will find help and I will get you – us – out of here. I just need you to hold on for me for a little while more. Could you do that, Lucy?”

Could she? Lucy was not quite certain of the answer. She had been so used to her father’s hold over her, his treatment of her, that she never truly considered an escape. When she finally considered it, it was because of Edward, and with his betrayal, her hopes of a different future died.

Could she hold on? And if she did, what was she holding on for?

“We can make a go of life, Lucy. You, me, and Nicolas. I know it’s not what you had hoped for, but we could do it.”

Maria’s caring voice broke through the last shields Lucy had erected around her heart, and a small smile broke out on her face.

A cottage somewhere far away, with Nicolas and Maria sounded pleasant. It was not by any means the happy future she had imagined with Edward, but it was not the bleak future she feared in this house either.

“That sounds nice, Maria.”

Maria shot her an encouraging smile and nodded. “So you will hold on for me?”

“I will. Thank you, Maria. For… for everything.”

Lucy rose to her feet, and in a sudden wave of emotion, she pulled the other woman close, enveloping her in a hug.

Perhaps it was always Maria and Nicolas who were meant to save her.

“Please, I beg of you… be careful.”

Maria nodded, and with a last quick hug she disappeared, leaving Lucy alone once more.

This was ridiculous, Lucy decided, her resolve growing more as she thought of Maria’s courage to go out and find help. She was not going to allow others to take control of her life any longer.

First it was her father, then she had given control to Edward, and now she depended on Maria to save her.

When was she going to stand up and save herself? When was she going to take control of the life she was granted?

It was her own life, after all. Why was she the only one not attempting to live it?

She threw the nightdress over her head and scrambled to her closet. In there somewhere was a pair of rather unladylike trousers Maria had secretly made for her when she had wished to ride horses like a man.