Page 77 of Reforming the Rakish Marquess

“A note? Jude. You were too big of a coward to face the lady? Why? Do you still have feelings for her?”

He should have been angered by his friend’s accusation, but he couldn’t find it in himself to feel anything other than resignation. He indeed took the coward’s way out.

“My feelings don’t matter. She is better off without me in her life,” Jude said, unwavering.

“Jude, you can let yourself be happy. I know you have your own ideas of what you expect your future to be, but you can succumb to the path that leads to wedded bliss and a family. I assure you, it’s quite delightful,” Evan said, patting him on the shoulder.

Jude shook his head. “It’s not that. I didn’t want to say this to Marina until you and I spoke of it, but…I learnt I have a daughter.”

Evan’s mouth dropped open, and he stared at Jude, blinking rapidly.

“I know. It was a shock to me, too. I intend to be the best of fathers for Rose. I can’t ask Juliana to face such a scandal on my behalf. She deserves to live a life where she isn’t exiled from society, and I can’t promise her that.”

“But you are a marquess. Surely between your title and all our friends, we can help minimize the impact of such gossip and reproach. More importantly, shouldn’t you allow Juliana to make that choice for herself? If she loves you and is as upset as Marina says, I believe she would choose the life with you,” Evan said, making more sense than Jude wished for him to.

He thought over Evan’s words for a moment but pushed down any hope.

“No. I can’t give her that choice. She is far too kind and would sacrifice herself for me. I can’t let her do that, for reasons that I can’t share with you. Please, I just need you to trust me on this.”

“I shall leave it alone for now, but I can’t guarantee my wife shall do the same. She has a mind of her own, as you well know,” Evan said.

“Indeed.” Jude forced a laugh. He wasn’t in the mood to do so but didn’t wish to take out his foul mood on his friend. “What made you come here today? Your wife’s desire to scold me?”

Evan shook his head. “No. Actually, it was Matt. He wrote to me and indicated that I should see what you were about. He didn’t tell me why. Then Marina insisted on accompanying me.”

He should have known Matt would have something to say about his disappearance.

Marina swept back into the room. “My love, I believe it is time for us to depart.”

The gentlemen rose to their feet.

“Of course, we must return to Arthur,” Evan said. Evan patted Jude on the back. “It was good seeing you. I hope we get to see you again soon.”

Marina stepped closer. “I believe we shall. This matter is far from resolved.” She narrowed her eyes at Jude before casting him a knowing smirk.

Jude was confused, and a bit intimidated by what she could mean, but it wouldn’t change the outcome. As soon as Evan filled her in on his reasoning, she wouldn’t wish for her friend to be anywhere near his scandal.

Marina would judge him even more harshly when she learnt of his shortcomings, not that he could regret that he now had Rose in his life. He certainly didn’t. He just longed for an understanding society that wouldn’t ruin Juliana’s reputation for associating with him. The ton’s insatiable curiosity for his life wouldn’t have been sparked if he hadn’t egged them on to publish all those sensational stories in the scandal sheets. He had made it all worse for himself.

“I wish you both a safe return home,” Jude said. “I shall plan a visit to meet Arthur soon.”

“See that you do,” Evan said before embracing him again. The couple saw themselves out to board their carriage.

Jude plopped back into his chair. That didn’t go as well as he hoped, but at least Evan knew. He could trust his friend not to share such delicate matters. He ran his fingers through his hair before massaging his temples. Marina’s reaction towards him didn’t bode well for how he would be received by the others.

“Papa!” a sweet little voice exclaimed, followed by the quick steps of Rose running over to his chair.

“She wished to come and see you, my lord,” Mrs. Jones said.

He scooped her up, and she wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m very glad she did,” Jude said, smiling at his daughter.

Returning her hug, he tried to push everything else from his mind. There was nothing he could do about it now.

Chapter Twenty-Five

The next day

Juliana released a sigh of thanks that the carriage ride to Marina’s passed without incident. She traveled with outriders since she completed the journey with only Bonnie for company. One can never be sure when they might meet a highwayman on the road. When her carriage pulled up in front of the grand country home, Marina and Evan appeared on the steps in a matter of moments.