Page 202 of Merciless Daddy

“Yes. With shelves. I don’t want to hide the books afterward. I suppose that I could do other things in that room as well. Not just coloring.”

My throat tightened.

She looked at me. “What?”

“I have to admit. Recently I have imagined a house. For both of us.”

Her breath caught.

“You have?”

“Yes.”

“Since when?”

I considered lying. There was no point.

“Since you fell asleep with your head in my lap and a coloring pencil in your hand.”

Her eyes filled.

“Does that frighten you?” she asked.

“Yes. It’s funny, I don’t fear death or pain or hardship. But this, I do.”

I said it plainly.

Her face changed. A small hurt. I reached across the table and took her hand.

“It frightens me because I know what it means,” I said. “It means I want something that can be taken from me. It means I want to promise you permanence when I spent ten years believing I could not keep it.”

Her fingers held mine.

“And?”

“And I can’t bear the thought that you might be taken from me. That you might decide, even, that I’m not good enough for you. That I could lose you through no fault of my own.”

Her eyes shone. She leaned in and I kissed her. Lightly, sweetly, with true, deep love.

Near sunset, we found a beach bar at the end of a narrow dock.

The floor was built over sand. Music played through old speakers. A few staff moved behind the counter, but the tables had been cleared. No crowd. No guards in sight.

Yelena looked at me.

“You organized this?”

“It was no big task. I just asked for some privacy.”

“You are incapable of doing anything casually.”

“That is not true!”

“You rented an arcade for our first date.”

“Well yes, but it was a good arcade. And casual!”

She accepted half a cocktail and drank it slowly. Something pink with crushed ice and too much fruit.