Page 75 of Queen of Ruin

“She was… small.”

“How small?” Raven asks. “If you had to guess.”

“I dunno.” I crack open one eye. “She was a kid. Small.”

“Do you think she could talk?” Bradley asks from the corner of the room. He stands there with his arms crossed, almost as if he’s afraid of coming closer. A man like that shouldn’t be afraid of anything, but in my few days here, I get the distinct impression that he’s carrying a lot of guilt over what happened, as if he’s taking responsibility despite none of us knowing what really happened.

“She could talk,” I say.

“That’s good enough.” Raven taps her keyboard. “Eye color?”

It’s difficult not to roll my eyes because the girl is as clear as day in my mind, but if I focus on her for too long, she gets fuzzy and her face melts into the faces of other people.

“Deep breaths,” Cassian murmurs softly. “You’ve got this.”

I breathe deeply in through my nose and out through my nose. “She had darker skin, like Cassian. Green eyes. Her hair was black and matted, pulled into two pigtails with really dirty green bows. She wore this little white dress that looked almost… weird. Like it didn’t belong on her.”

“Weird how?” Raven asks. “Like it was too big for her?”

I open my eyes again. “No, it was like those sorts of cover dresses you’d put on a kid to stop them from getting their clothes dirty, y’know? And she was clutching this really ragged bunny rabbit by the ear.”

“This is good,” is the last thing Raven says and then she slides off the table and disappears underneath it.

My brows lift, but no one else seems surprised by this.

“What about the dead body?” Cassian asks. “Do you remember anything distinct about it?”

Gazing down at my hands, I shake my head and sigh deeply. “No. It was so dark. I remember… someone was asking me who I was over and over again, but I can’t remember if that was in connection to the body at my feet or the person behind me who was hitting me. They just kept yelling it at me.” A deep, weary sigh rushes past my lips. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Bradley suddenly steps forward. “If they didn’t know who you were, then that’s just as valuable as if they did know who you were. It narrows down the pool of suspects greatly.”

“If they were telling the truth,” Cassian reminds him. “They very well could have been lying to see what that would gain them.”

“True.” Bradley sits across from me, his brows low.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself,” I say as the door opens and Ruslan enters.

“How can I not?” Bradley meets my eyes. “We are a team. We’re close… were close. I can’t imagine any situation where you would be in trouble and wouldn’t tell me. So either it was something you didn’t trust me with or it was something that got the drop on you, and I don’t know what’s more alarming.”

“I get the feeling I would have told you.” I press my fingertips together. “Or… there was a really good reason I kept it quiet.”

“But you remembered something, right?” Ruslan leans against the table and watches me with the same, weighty look of hope in his eyes. “Something good?”

“A kid. And ribbons. And a rabbit and a dead body, but that’s it.”

“Shit. One hell of a puzzle.” He sighs deeply, then glances at Bradley. “Ivy and Zira want to take her out for dinner. Give her something normal to see if that helps.”

“Do I get a say in this?” I ask with a smile.

“No,” Ruslan and Bradley say in unison. “You can’t say no to them when they get together.”

“It’s a little intimidating.” Ruslan laughs. “But I think it’s a good idea. I can’t imagine the pressure you feel right now.”

“You mean the pressure of seeing you all look at me, expecting to see someone who isn’t me right now?” I joke weakly. “Oh, it’s a delight.”

“But Diego helps, doesn’t he?” Cassian remarks. “He knows whatever version of you that you are now. He doesn’t hold what we hold.”

“No.” I smile warmly. “He doesn’t. I don’t know where I would be without him.”