Page 90 of Knot Broken

“Yeah, you do.”

His voice was destroyed, a guttural sound like nails raked across my skin as his hand gripped mine tight, and then it happened. It was like one big exhale and all that was Ethan was replaced by a beautiful silver-grey wolf.

“Oh my…” My hand went to my mouth as I struggled to take him in, but the wolf wasn’t having any of that. A wag of his tail and he was shoving his head into my shoulder, snuffling, right before my arms went around him. “Your fur is so soft.”

I sank my fingers into it, rubbing my face in his ruff and breathing in that sandalwoody scent that was all Ethan. A great big lick on the side of my face had me falling back.

“OK, doggy kisses have an entirely different vibe when I’ve made out with your human form, so no more of that, OK?” The wolf sat down on his haunches, then whined before pawing at my hand. “Well, maybe a few after what you’ve gone through.”

“But it was worth it, right?” Tex sat down beside me. “Honestly, that was one of his easier shifts.” The wolf seemed to feel left out, so he flopped onto the floor, his head landing in my lap. What could I do but caress all that thick fur, tracing the long shape of Ethan-wolf’s skull? “I think you might have something to do with that.”

“Is that how it works?” I shifted on the floor, thinking I still needed to get comfortable, but it was something else. A whole other part of me was surfacing, pushing forward to peer out at Ethan’s wolf. “We can help each other shift?”

“I’m not sure.” Tex smiled as he shrugged. “Packs are fated to be together. Maybe for us, this is why.”

For several minutes, there was only the feel of Ethan’s fur, his nose insistently pushing into my hand every time I stopped, but it was the steady tick of the pump at my side that caught my attention.

“Then I need to try,” I said. “I’ll talk to Riley, see if we can up the hormone levels.”

Tex’s smile faded.

“You’re sure?”

Before I could answer, Ethan wolf’s eyes rolled up and stared at me as he let out a little whine.

“No.” With a smile, I gave the wolf another pat. “But they say sometimes you’ve got to wait until the pain of staying where you are is worse than the pain of changing.” With a blink, I felt the tears that had remained unshed fall free, landing in all that thick fur. “I think I’m ready to make a change.”

“Good.” Changing back wasn’t anywhere near as hard for Ethan, because suddenly there was a very tired, very naked man lying with his head in my lap. “Because I don’t think I’ve got another shift in me.”

“You didn’t…” My hand hovered, then I stroked his face just like I had his furry counterpart. “I’m not sure if I want to see you go through that much pain ever again.”

“Worth it.” His eyes fell closed. “But I might need to pop a couple of ibuprofen and have a little lie down now.”

“You do that,” Tex said, “while I take our mate to see Riley.”

In the end, Ethan decided to hold off resting until after I met with the scientist. She looked up when I walked in the door, then smiled.

“This is the face of a woman who’s made a major life decision.”

I sat down and nodded.

“I want to shift,” I said. “The hormones, how much higher can we safely go?”

“Let’s take a look at your levels,” she replied, turning back to her screen, “and find out.”

Chapter 43

Nadia

It was right about now I began to question my life decisions.

The pump began to tick faster and faster and with it went my heart rate. Riley and her team were now seated behind a glass wall, watching us and an array of monitors, but my view of them was blocked by Ethan and Tex as they moved closer.

“How we doing, Nadia?” Tex asked.

“I’m OK.”

The answer, the furtive smile, were an automatic response, because whatever was happening to my body was about to make a liar out of me. Something that felt like a period cramp on steroids had my hand slapping down over my stomach, but that wasn’t where the pain was coming from.