Page 26 of Crazy as Hell

She was being tortured over and over again.

Not wanting to disturb her, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stood, unable to remain still. He stalked toward the bathroom, trying desperately to make sense of the chaos in his mind. He automatically began cataloging the details of the vision, searching for patterns and connections. Different locations. Different circumstances. Different lifetimes. There were simply no hints that helped him decipher who had caused the turmoil in her life, or how to stop it.

The implications of that were horrifying.

Turning on the shower, he stepped under the hot water. He could have used his magic to clean himself, but he felt a desperate need to physically wash away the memories of Naomi’s various deaths. Yet, he knew there was nothing within the six realms that was powerful enough to wipe his mind clean of her suffering.

For the first time in centuries, Viktor found himself genuinely afraid. He wasn’t sure how to stop the death loop. Her safety was his top priority, and not being able to protect her left him feeling completely out of control. It was soul-destroying to imagine how many more times he would be forced to watch her die.

Even the thought of that made him feel sick.

He felt an immense amount of comfort when Naomi wrapped her arms around him from behind. “Did I wake you?”

“No. The thought of a big bowl of noodles did.” She paused before saying, “I’m sorry you had to see all of that. I know my situation is pretty fucked up.”

He spun around and pulled her into his arms. “Don’t say that. It is important to me to know what you’ve been going through. You need to know that you are not alone. Not anymore.”

Naomi traced the circular mating mark on his chest with her finger. She thought the silvery iridescent mark was beautiful, though she was a little surprised at just how bright it was. When she had first seen the ancient symbol on his chest, it had been a faded impression. Like a shadow that had somehow carried over from the previous cycle. Now, it was like a freaking beacon of light. She’d seen bond marks on other mated couples, but never any that were this bright. She wasn’t even sure regular clothing would be enough to cover it.

She didn’t mind, though. Seeing him branded with physical proof that he belonged to her filled her with a primal sense of satisfaction. She’d never realized just how possessive she was before meeting Viktor.

Then again, before him, there had never been a need.

Being with Viktor was a rare, precious kind of joy in her life. One she had never expected to find and wasn’t entirely sure she would be allowed to keep. After everything she had endured, finding him almost felt like a reward for surviving it all. Every cycle, every terrifying death, every moment when she had been certain she would never make it to tomorrow, all of it suddenly seemed worth enduring since it had ultimately led her to him.

She was trying not to think about how long their happiness would last. Trying not to obsess over what could go wrong, or when the universe might decide to take it away from her. Her life had taught her that happiness came with an expiration date, and she had learned the hard way that no matter how careful she was, tragedy could find her at any moment.

Initially, she had been in a rush to have sex with Viktor before some disaster struck. Like a sudden storm destroying the island, or the house bursting into flames. Before some completely ridiculous, horrifying accident once again ended her life.

It had seemed almost absurd to believe she could have something as simple as a night with her mate without the universe finding a way to ruin it.

At first, that urgency had made her want to rush. If she only had a limited amount of time with Viktor, then she wanted to make every second count. She wanted to hold him, kiss him, and lose herself in all the feelings she’d spent so long believing she would never have the chance to experience.

Their first kiss had stripped the urgency away. For once, she hadn’t been thinking about the next death, the next loop, or the countless ways everything could go wrong. She hadn’t been calculating how much time she might have left. She had simply been there with Viktor, enjoying his warmth and the way he made her feel.

For the first time in what felt like forever, she didn’t want to rush toward anything.

She wanted to savor it all.

Every kiss.

Every touch.

Every conversation they shared.

Every laugh that escaped him when she said or did something ridiculous. She wanted to memorize the sound of his voice, and the way his eyes softened when he looked at her. She wanted to remember what it felt like to be held by him, to reach for him without fear, and to know that he would always be there by her side.

She didn’t want their relationship to become another countdown.

She wanted a future with him.

And maybe that was the hardest part. She had spent so long surviving in her fucked up version of reality that she had forgotten how to simply live with the promise of tomorrow. She refused to let fear steal the happiness she had fought so hard to find.

Whatever happened, she had Viktor now.

And for once, now was enough.

“Now that you mentioned it, our mating marks are particularly bright,” he said, glancing down at the matching symbols they wore.