Page 81 of The Amber Sunburst

“Of course we are,” she repeats, keeping her distance from him to ready herself for another round.

When Eudoxia gets back to her room, she’s still off-kilter.

She expects to come back to Ophelia and Arete giggling as usual, but when she opens the door she finds Arete alone, lying on the bed. She’s surrounded by candy wrappers, throwing a ball up and down.

“Where’s Ophelia?” Eudoxia asks, toeing off her high-tops and unbuttoning her linen shirt.

“She stopped by with some candy, but she said there were some nighttime rituals at the Temple so she couldn’t stay.” Arete’s voice is monotone, far from her usual buzz.

“Okay.”

Arete doesn’t speak as Eudoxia changes for bed and doesn’t move to help when Eudoxia gathers the wrappers strewn all about to throw them away. She just keeps tossing and catching her red ball, staring at the ceiling.

“We have a trash can for a reason, Arete,” Eudoxia sighs. She shouldn’t have said it—not when Arete is clearly in a state. But she can’t help it. Can’t ever stay silent. Can’t ever stop when enough is enough.

Arete sits up slowly. “There’s also kindness for a reason, Xia, but you don’t give it to me, do you?”

Her voice is scarily calm despite the words.

Eudoxia is the older one, the responsible one. She cannot drop to her sister’s level. She needs to stay mature, to handle this situation like an adult.

But when has she ever done that?

“I don’t give you kindness? Really?” she says, her voice not forgiving even though she knows it should be.

Arete laughs with far too much bitterness for a ten-year-old girl. “You don’t care about me. You don’t love me!”

“Of course I love you. Why do you think I do all of this?” she shouts, gesturing to the room, the protection she’s offered.

“If you loved me you wouldn’t make me stay inside like your pet and treat me like you don’t want me around and hide me from your friends and lock me away like you’re ashamed of me.”

“When have I ever implied that I’m ashamed of you?”

“All the time!”

“Everything I do, I do to keep you safe. What about that can you not understand?”

“Safety is all you care about anymore. You don’t care about me.”

“Arete, stop acting like a child. Do you know how much harder you make my life? Do you know how much work I put into having you here? How much you have ruined for me? I could have had a normal life here if not for you.”

“Well then why did you even bring me?” Arete screams.

“I don’t know!”

“I hate you!”

“I should have left you there,” Eudoxia yells, not thinking. “I should have left you with him and let him do what he wanted with you. Better that than having you be so impossible.”

Eudoxia regrets it the moment she says it.

She’s despicable, bringing him into this. What he could have done had Eudoxia left Arete there.

She and Arete fight constantly—Forms, do they fight—but this time her ten-year-old sister is looking up at her like she doesn’t recognize her and Eudoxia has no idea how to fix it.

“I’m going to the bathroom,” Eudoxia exhales. “Be in bed by the time I get back.”

Arete responds with a sniffle, and Eudoxia walks away anyway.