Page 117 of Not a Word

“Why?”

Holden gripped the wheel a little tighter. “A whole bunch of things got real clear today, like the clouds opening up and the sun shining in?” He shook his head slowly, as though still putting the pieces together. “I’m the lesser brother.”

“Huh?”

“I’m not whole like your dad. Not to my mom. Explains a lot.”

“I’m not getting any of this.”

Holden took one hand off the wheel and waved it around. “It’s okay. I’ll get her to explain it, you can get it firsthand.”

“You’re gonna confront her?”

“Yeah.”

Gage shook his head vehemently. “No way, not again.”

“It’s different this time,” Holden said.

“Let me out.”

“No, come on, man, I need you.”

“I want to go home.”

“Okay, okay, look. I’ll swing by Alicia’s, see if she’s there, and if I can talk her into coming with me, you’re off the hook.”

“I’m off the hook no matter what.”

Holden sighed. “Fine, I’ll see if Alicia’s there, drop you off back at your house, regardless.”

“Thanks.”

They were silent as Holden made a couple of turns, bailing on the route to his mother’s place and instead heading to Alicia’s.

Quietly, Holden asked, “You okay?”

“No.”

“It’s all going to work out.”

Gage shrugged.

“My dad,” Holden said, “did some dumb stuff in his life, but at his heart, he was a good guy. Cared more about others than he did about himself. Had a conscience. That’s why he quit Big Pharma. He was even willing, for my sake and Reece’s, to stay in a marriage he didn’t want to be in. That says something, right?”

“Yeah,” Gage said. “I know.”

“Just up here,” he said, looking ahead, nodding. “She’s in that building on the right.”

He parked on the street and tried texting Alicia one last time. When he didn’t get a reply, he said, “If she doesn’t want to talk to me, she can tell me why to my face. Come on.”

They got out of the Honda and entered the lobby of the low-rise apartment. Holden had a key, so he didn’t have to buzz to get Alicia to let him in. They took the elevator up, headed down the hall, and stood together outside the door to her place.

Holden rapped on it with the knuckle of his middle finger. “Hey, Aleesh?” he said, putting his mouth to the doorjamb. “It’s me.”

The knock went unanswered.

He knocked again, louder this time. “If I did something to piss you off, just tell me.” He waited another moment, then turned to Gage and shrugged.