Page 105 of The Fall

“I keep telling you that Cam is right there.” Jenni gestured toward the door as if Cam stood just outside.

“Yes, but Cam wants the dangly bits and the gene that makes those are the ones the retrovirus targets.”

Lusa and Kerr shared a confused glance. Jenni looked exasperated. Mackenzie huffed and explained. “The gene is non-recombinant, which made it a perfect insertion point. The rest of them, I can shuffle around.”

Lusa frowned. “What?”

Mackenzie stole the pad from Jenni and made some swiping gestures before turning it around. The disconcertingly accurate diagram showed Kerr, with an intact right forearm before it zoomed in on the pelvis. “I’m going to encode sperm-producing ovotestes.” Mackenzie glanced over at Kerr.

Kerr was utterly bewildered. Too much was happening too fast. Too much had already happened. Mackenzie ignored all of it and pointed to another section. “These new veins will run to the surface to carry heat away and this thicker seminary vesicle will keep them insulated. I also gave them the same acid resistance as the oocytes. Then they reroute to the skein glands.”

“I don’t know what those words mean.” Kerr’s forehead was stiff, but she could feel herself frowning.

“You don’t need to,” Mackenzie said with perfect nonchalance. “You only need to know that you should take scissoring out of your repertoire or you’ll potentially get Lusa pregnant.”

“I don’t want to get pregnant!” Lusa’s voice rose an octave.

“I would be a terrible mother, yeah?” Kerr hoped voicing reality would put Lusa at ease and Mackenzie on a different track. “Or father?” The lack of movement in her muscles wound up in her face.

Mackenzie waved both of their objections aside. “It comes with the bioengineered cyberware. Funny how I spent so long designing it and never came up with a better name.” Mackenzie nattered on as if they were a fun side experiment. “It won’t be quite the same as the cyberware you’re used to, but there’ll be no decrease in fertility either.” She peered uncomfortably close. “I’m interested to see how it works in a specimen without my level of intellect.”

“So, my options are brain in a jar or become your weird science experiment?” Kerr’s pulse racing made it hard to talk.

“Yes.” Jenni and Mackenzie said in unison. Jenni acknowledging the truth, despite her hesitation did not give her hope.

“Don’t I get a say in this?” Lusa’s grip was like a vice.

Kerr looked from Mackenzie to Jenni. “Can you give us a moment?”

The door clicked shut. Lusa waited, an aura of high voltage electricity crackling around her, like she would burn the medical centre down at any moment. Kerr swallowed thickly. “I know we just met.”

“No.” Lusa interrupted. “I know my parents had some whirlwind instalove romance and it worked out. I’m not them. I don’t want to have your babies, or anyone else’s.”

Kerr managed to wobble her head a little. “Look. I like you. A lot. And I also want to take things slow. But this isn’t about you.”

Lusa chewed at the inside of her cheek and looked away. Kerr might not be the best at relationships either, but she’d seen that look often enough to know there was more. Lusa was scared of something else, not that she would admit it.

Kerr tried anyway. “What is this really about?”

“I already told you. No babies. The thought of getting pregnant creeps me out.” She clipped her words and still refused to meet her eyes.

Kerr tried to shrug, but she only felt the muscles in her neck tense. “I agree. No babies. I’d be a terrible father-mother anyway.” She tried to make it sound like a joke, but Lusa’s expression didn’t change. “There’s more though, yeah?”

“I can’t…” Lusa couldn’t finish the sentence. She turned away further in case a tear fell.

“You can’t what?” Kerr asked, but Lusa didn’t budge. Several moments passed in the soft hum of the Hexaline lights. Kerr tried to sigh, but even that required more muscle power than she was currently able to produce. “We’re not in Tyton, are we?”

Lusa didn’t say anything, but Kerr caught the slightest ripple of her glossy black hair.

“Is this where you live?” Kerr tried to keep the conversation going. She had a feeling that if Lusa shut down, it would be a very long time before she got her back.

Lusa sniffed and blinked away the moisture that threatened to fall before she turned to look out a small window. Filtered through clouds and windswept leaves, sunlight splashed yellow beams across her gorgeous sienna skin. Kerr could tell by the light alone that they were no longer in the city, even if Lusa hadn’t confirmed it.

“I need to go.” Lusa stood abruptly.

Kerr tried to hold her back, but her fingers wouldn’t respond. “Stop!”

Lusa hesitated at the doorway. Kerr took several halting breaths, trying to find words that would explain how terrified she felt. How everyone left her. How she was never enough, or always too much.