Page 39 of Where We Belong

*

Nyk shows up at my door wearing an adorable grin, his bright white waves brushing his shoulders and his dark beard a little wilder than usual. We make small talk as we head toward the front of the palace, though he keeps a few paces ahead — probably avoiding my smell. I’ve just worked up the nerve to ask where Kaed is but my uncle is already in front of us. He thanks Nyk, who retreats with a look on his face I can’t place. The King’s deep crimson robes flutter in the warm breeze. His locs are now neat and tight, woven into thick French braids, the shells adorning them clattering as they sway down his back. I follow him to a towering spiral structure. Craning my neck, I squint, trying to see the top. From somewhere nearby, the ‘left-right-left’ chants of soldiers flows through the air, and don’t ask me how I know, but Kaed is there.

“This,” the King says reverently, “is the beginning.” The cool air in the tower wraps around me like a duvet and a chill seeps into the boots I had to request from Thea and Fawn to attend Aiden’s dumb ass class.

We climb a spiral staircase that hugs the curved walls before we’re deposited into a grand, cavernous room and I hesitate on the threshold. There’s no other word to describe it but magic. Something stirs in my chest like a cage has been opened, no obliterated. The space is alive with colour, deep blues, rich purples, and shimmering golds blend in sprawling mosaics that cover every inch of the walls. Designs move as I walk past them, almost like a trick of light, but I’m certain it’s not. One catches my eye. Three-horned figures with wicked grins are tossing people down the Chasm. “Is this how you got down here?”

“No actually, this is after Feye built the basin. He took some fae to The Above with him to check it worked, and the gods threw them back down again.” He points to the evil-looking fish monsters tiled around the turquoise sea. A few snap in my direction. “They created these, and the curse of insanity to avoid it happening again.”

“Is that supposed to be me?” I wander over to a beautifully plump, tall, very serious-looking woman carved out of stone at the side of a golden altar. A book in her hands with Our Freedom etched across it. She looks like she hasn’t enjoyed a single day since the dawn of time. My uncle chuckles. Glassless windows line the walls, and from here, the seas are so close, as though I can reach out and touch the underside of the water.

“Would you like to learn to harness your magic?” He settles into one of the pews. “There are no wards in this temple. Magic cannot be restrained here; that’s why I brought you. I am not scared of you, Ashley, and I do not want you to be scared of yourself.”

“I’m not scared. I use it sometimes, up there.” I gesture to the rippling seas through the window. “Sometimes on purpose, sometimes not. I just don’t want to see those flames again.” Something about looking into my dad’s face and talking about the very thing that took his life, breaks something in me. “I just—I’m just so sorry, and I’m— I’m so tired.” Before I know it, the King’s arms are wrapped around me. He holds me up whilst my knees buckle under the weight of my heavy heart.

I mumble apologies into his chest. Sick and tired of crying. But how am I supposed to get out of this? How do you stop doing the things you hate when it’s all you know?

“Ashley, how can we blame a child for its actions? The laws in both our lands and religions recognise children do not have autonomy. I am certain you did not want to manifest your magic in the way you did and would take it back if you could. That is true repentance.” I understand his comforting words, my brain is telling me he’s right, but they are struggling to take root in my heart.

“Yes, your destiny has unfortunately been written for you; it is cruel and unfair, just like what happened as you were held hostage. Just like your parents’ death. But it is not the end. I swear I will give everything I have to help you to live.”

“You sound like Kaed. But that will just leave a lot of dead bodies. All because of me.” I grip the back of his robes.

“The Captain said that? Well, there you go, there are two of us.” He rubs my shoulders, peering at me over his spectacles with a small smile.

“You’re going to make me marry him.” I peel myself out of his grip, avoiding his eyes.

“I am not going to make you do anything you do not want to.” He sighs, shaking his head. “I believe in choice, it is fate that does not.”

“What does that mean?”

“No matter what path you walk, whatever choices you make, this was always the road set before you. The Creed speaks of taking your strength, your sacrifice. And in our lands, these words are bound to breath, magic, to life itself. But if you grow stronger, in body and in power, learn to love our land and people, I am confident you can endure. That is why I have brought you here. That is what I am trying to give you now. Strength. Allow me to help you.”

How poetic it would be if my uncle had brought me here to help, only for me to burn him alive and to destroy this place the way I’d destroyed everything else. I wipe the last of my tears with the heel of my palm.

“King Feye built this to communicate with the other three Gods. Its twin located in The Above. I’m sure Aiden has caught you up by now.” Even in my disheveled state, I can still scoff at the sound of my brother’s name, provoking a knowing chuckle from the King. He studies me, probably deciding how much truth I can handle. “Fae mature twice. A little like human puberty, but magic. The first maturity happens somewhere between eight and eleven years old,” he continues. “That’s when we first receive our power. And yes, it can be... explosive.” My stomach churns. The fire.

“The second is when we turn immortal, and there is no set time for that. Sometimes, it cruelly takes infants. Other times, it chooses those already riddled with age and sickness.” He tilts his head slightly. “But there is a third, which is just for Feye’s royal bloodline. We each develop an expression of mind magic. My father could preserve a mind from sickness, and my brother could erase thoughts. It got us out of a lot of trouble as children.” He smiles fondly, and I wonder if my father ever took away any of my thoughts. Or my mum’s. “When it manifests, it’s sudden and rather shocking. Have you felt anything like that?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Unless it’s already manifested itself and it’s the power to be batshit.

“I will teach you how to manage it, you just need to let me know as soon as you feel it, okay?”

I nod.

“Have you and Captain been getting along?” He asks, his smile turning a little cheeky.

I shrug. “I’ve only spoken to him once since we arrived.”

“Hmm, so you haven’t kissed?”

“Huh, oh my gosh, no!” My cheeks heat, but I’m not sure if it’s in embarrassment or at the thought of Kaed’s lips on mine.

He chuckles, holding his hands up in mock surrender. “Okay, okay. Just an old man asking a question.”

“Do I have to let you know if that happens too?” Not that it will, of course.

He beckons me over to the front of the altar. “It would be helpful for you to do it in a controlled setting, preferably at the bonding ceremony, should you wish to proceed. There could be many complications, especially for my Captain, should it happen any other way. Now, show me how you can control your magic so far.”