Page 46 of Finding His Fox

Cliff lifted the cover and gave me a small smile, as if he was looking for my stamp of approval. He didn’t have to.

It looked and smelled amazing. For a split second, I was tempted to grab the tray for myself. To lock myself in the bedroom and devour the entire tray in one sitting.

“It looks great,” I said, giving Cliff a reassuring smile.

I had been feeling guilty ever since I gave Cliff the cold shoulder last week. He threw me off guard.

Not just because he was an unexpected guest and I wanted to spend some quality time alone with my best friend, but by how much he reminded me of my past self. Before my dad, Jim, died.

We took a seat in the living room and talked a little more while Ian ordered Chinese.

I tried to get him to relax and asked him about himself. I didn’t want him tiptoeing around me. We chose a movie to watch and, to my surprise, we had the same one in mind.

Cliff was a little shy and awkward at first. As our conversation went on, he started to open up and even got comfortable enough to crack a few jokes.

Now that I got to know him a little more, I could see why he and Ian got along well.

A small part of me was pointing at the alarm bells ringing loudly in my head.

Warning! Dangerously close to making another friend. In Fox Haven. What was happening to me?

I already had Rory, Josie, Ian and Cal. I knew too many people in town, too many connections to Fox Haven. Was there room for one more?

Although the ribs were pretty good, I mused to myself.

“Ok, so food’s coming soon. What were you saying about Cal?” Ian asked.

Ian took the empty space between me and Cliff. He removed the cover of the rib tray and took one whole slab. That glutton!

I grabbed one for myself and took a mental count of the number of slabs in the tray.

It looked like there were more than enough for everyone. Yet, I knew Ian. His stomach knew no bounds.

“I never said anything about Cal,” I said, munching thoughtfully.

Cliff sighed. “I wish I had someone I never said anything about,” he said, then quickly covered his mouth, his cheeks slightly reddening. “Did I say that out loud?”

“Spill it. Who is he?” Ian asked, leaning forward.

“Well, he’s a friend of my brother’s. I’ve had a crush on him for the longest time,” Cliff said, looking down at the pillow on his lap.

He continued, “I’m worried he’ll only see me as his friend’s little brother. I don’t want to risk our friendship by telling him how I feel.”

Wow. Did I say Cliff reminded me of myself? No, he was braver than me. I was in awe.

I would never have had the courage to share something like that before but now, I felt like I could.

I rubbed the back of my neck and took in a deep breath. “Cal and I, we’ve been hanging out. A lot.”

Ian pointed at me excitedly, and said “Aha! I was right!”

Although it came out pretty garbled because his mouth was full of ribs.

I put a hand up, wanting to continue, “Lately, my feelings have grown stronger. Even a simple smile from him already makes my heart skip a beat. But I’m just afraid…” I looked down and couldn’t go on.

Ian reached out and held my arm and Cliff’s, “We’re all scared. I certainly was, with Owen. But we can’t let fear hold us back from potentially finding happiness. We owe it to ourselves.”

Cliff and I nodded in agreement. We spent the rest of the evening gorging ourselves with food and talking about horrible relationships and other funny stories.