Page 44 of Indebted

I didn’t understand it.

“Why?”

At his frown I swallowed the lump in my throat and continued.

“Why do you want me?” I hated that I sounded small, but no one’s wanted me. My father wanted nothing to do with me—according to my mother. I was a passing fancy for most of the male ‘relationships’ I’ve had, unable to commit to any of them, but neither did any of them fight for me. My mother chose to live a life away from me. And Justin…I didn’t dare dream of knowing what he was thinking. The fact that I cared what he thought scared me.

He cupped my face, the act so gentle it startled me. A soft tug brought me to my feet where he lowered his forehead to mine. “Because you’re stubborn.”

I frowned and he smiled.

“I saw a girl grow into a woman over a handful of years. You balanced school and work. Multiple jobs. All while maintaining your grades.”

I almost asked how he knew that, but remembered that’d he’d kept tabs on me.

Why would he do that if he didn’t want me around? The logistics didn’t compute. Someone with no relation to another human being other than a fleeting marriage, didn’t monitor said human when the only tether between them snapped.

“You’re determined. Your drive is admirable. You’re bettering yourself and not afraid to put in the hard work to do it. You’re independent to the point that teamwork isn’t even in your vocabulary.”

I opened my mouth, but his thumb pressed against my mouth, quieting my words. The touch resonated to my toes and he didn’t pull his finger away.

I ran my tongue along the pad and watched the azurite of his eyes liquify to blue lava.

His throat worked. “You’re the antithesis of a team player, and yet, you can’t hide your empathy. I see it when you hold the hands of girls about to go under for nose jobs their mother’s want, or the way you dote on anyone who comes through my door for Botox treatment for migraines. How you tell anyone and everyone about the clinic when they come in asking about facial reconstruction and unfortunate circumstances. You try and close yourself off Katie, but you can’t. You shouldn’t.”

I trembled.

Trembled.

Justin saw me. And I didn’t know how to process it. I’d always been my own program, running in the background. Head down—working hard, working for…

I didn’t even know anymore.

Money?

A stable job?

I’ve always chased this end goal. My degree. A job. But once I had those secured, what did I really have? What did I really want when that’s all I’ve ever wanted?

Staring at Justin in that moment, staring at me. There was no doubt what I wanted.

I’d spent so long convincing myself it was wrong—a betrayal to myself and I was sick of standing in my own way.

“Kiss me.”

I expected a frenzied mashing of lips. I craved it. But instead, Justin lifted his thumb, brushing the damp skin against my cheek. Both hands cradled my head, as if I was something precious that could break.

It was that cradling that reached inside and squeezed my heart.

My time with Justin was finite, but now I knew without a shadow of a doubt that it would crush me by the end.

And as his lips brushed against mine, I was okay with it.

Chapter 16

What started as a slow sampling of lips turned deeper, hotter, harder.

A runaway train.