Page 33 of Witch’s Heart

“I know. Herrin made a promise to her to get me out. Otherwise he would have stayed and fought. Stayed and died.”

“I wondered what he was doing here.”

“Where is he?” I asked.

“Went with the witches back to the King’s Mantle. I didn’t have a chance to speak with him before that. I was a little preoccupied.”

“Right. Well, then.”

I took the opportunity to tell him everything that had happened, from the moment I arrived at the Citadel, summoned to the council chambers, to my conversations with Fiona, Gianna seeing the darkness in me, and the hunt that followed. His breathing was elevated by the end of it. Throughout my retelling, he continued to trace soothing patterns along my back. Still, my voice was shaking by the end.

“Is it bad that part of me wants to say fuck it all and hand Skye the crown?” he admitted.

“I know you don’t want to be king.”

“I’d be less adverse to ruling if you ruled beside me, Mina. As my queen.”

“Rixon…”

“Think about it. I’m stuck here, whether we like it or not. You didn’t find enough in that journal to solve our portal problem. I want you with me in this. Completely. Are you?”

“I’m not going anywhere, Rixon. Yes, I’m with you—as your witch,” I clarified, pressing my face into his chest, relishing in the sound of his heartbeat. He might have accepted the way things were, but I hadn’t. I had no intention of giving up my search for a solution.

“Everything in my life is spinning out of control right now,” he admitted. “You are the only constant. The one thing I can count on.”

I pressed my lips to his skin, peppering him with gentle kisses. “Is that why you were in such a controlling mood last night?”

“Yes,” he growled. “Did you like it?”

“Oh, very much.”

“I… I didn’t hurt you, did I? It wasn’t too much?”

“I could have freed myself with magic, Rixon. I’m a witch, after all.”

“Right.” His chest deflated with an exhale. “What if…?”

“What if…what?” I lifted my head to look at him.

“What if I put you into a situation where you couldn’t? Where you were completely at my mercy—completely under my control? Would you trust me enough to allow it? To do whatever I wanted, knowing there was no possible way to stop me?”

His question sent a ripple of unease skittering across my skin. “I…I don’t know. The idea scares me. A lot, actually.”

“You fear what I might do to you?”

I frowned, trying to dig deeper into my misgivings. “Magic is my safety net. Without it, I feel helpless. I never stood a chance against those thieves who tried to take my virtue. Who tried to hurt my sister. It was only magic that freed me—even if it killed her. You saw how I reacted the first time you tried to cover my mouth.”

He hummed in agreement.

“I’ve grown used to feeling safe, knowing I can protect myself if needed. It’s why I trained so hard with Herrin. There are only a few times that’ve come close to what I experienced that fateful day. When you nearly died, and when your father captured me. Both times, it was a horrible feeling. Horrible knowing I was completely helpless.”

“I don’t want you to feel horrible, Mina. But I want you at my mercy, completely helpless against me.” I swallowed, trying to come to terms with his words. “There’s a difference between what I want, and what happened to you. Still, it’s fucked up, I know⁠—”

“It’s not fucked up.”

“No?”

I sighed. “This is what you need to feel more in control. Like you said, I’m the only constant in your life, the one person you can rely on. In freezing you out and then running away, I probably triggered your need for control and simply made things worse, especially when everything was already pressing in on you. Politics, the council, that fucking crown you hate so much.”