Page 43 of Witch’s Heart

“Would…that they could,” he managed. Herrin took him down in a single sweep. He panted several breaths up at the ceiling before the male offered a hand, pulling him up. They began circling again. Finally, he said, “I’m having control issues. I’m projecting those issues onto my lady witch, which isn’t fair to her.”

“Ah. One of the hardest things as a wielder is giving up control when we take our oath and bond a witch. This was never a problem before, was it?”

“No. It shouldn’t be now, either.” He moved through a series of jabs and punches, only landing a single lucky one against Herrin’s shoulder. The male quickly recovered.

“What happens when you fight an opponent?” Herrin asked. “When you fight me? How do you combat your lack of control over my moves?”

He frowned, then dodged a blow that would have broken his jaw. “I…I don’t. I just react. For every move you make against me, I react in kind, either by blocking or by my own follow-up.”

“Exactly. Isn’t that life? A series of reactions?”

“Yes, but I’m the king. My reactions don’t just affect me, they affect an entire kingdom. If I can’t control the outcome, chaos will ensue.”

Herrin made a humming noise. “You can never control everything. But I understand your argument all the same.” They exchanged another set of blows before Herrin said, “Have you brought this up with Mina?”

“Sort of. But what I asked of her…” He wasn’t going to explain his sexual fantasies to Herrin. “She went behind my back after I confessed how I was feeling. I think she was trying to help, except it only illustrated one of my own failures.”

The fact that he’d had a week with the assassin and hadn’t managed to get a single helpful hint from the male.

“That must be a blow to your pride?”

“My…my pride?” He stopped and blinked. A bead of sweat dropped into his eye and burned. Was it a blow?

But of course it was. Mina had succeeded where his own efforts had failed. Moreover, she’d succeeded because she’d used a demon to aid her, calling upon the thing that lived inside her, something that had always created a shiver of fear in him, because it was unpredictable. That unpredictability went hand in hand with lack of control, though she’d gotten good at controlling it.

“Ah.” Herrin studied him. “We wielders have a fierce pride of our own. It often gets overshadowed by our witches. Our duty, first and foremost, is to protect our bonded witch. You now have two duties—to your witch and to your people. You’ll have to find a new balance. I wish I could give you all the answers but, who am I to say what is right?”

Herrin walked over to a stack of towels and grabbed one for each of them.

Rixon wiped his face, deep in thought. Mina had wounded his pride—making him feel less capable than ever in his new role—though, not intentionally. That’s really what this boiled down to, playing into the reminder of how out of control much of his life had become.

“I said it before, and I’ll say it again,” Herrin said, fussing with his clothes. He was covered in marks that would soon turn to bruises, but didn’t seem to mind. “You aren’t one to turn from a duty you’ve accepted. Your lady witch, your kingdom. Perhaps you just need time. Perfection is impossible. You’ll make mistakes. People will suffer for it. There’s no getting around that. You can only do the best that you can do, and the sooner you accept that, the sooner you’ll feel more in control of things.”

He rubbed a hand over his face. Herrin’s words weren’t what he wanted to hear. He didn’t want to make mistakes. He didn’t want his people to pay the price. Still, he said, “Thank you,” and clapped his hand on the male’s shoulder, then went in search of his witch.

Chapter 15

Mina

I was nearly shaking with anxiety as I paced inside Rixon’s chambers. He’d avoided me for days, time which I’d spent buried in research, if only to avoid thoughts of us. I was no closer to a solution for closing the portal. Rixon would continue feeding it blood and I hated that.

When I wasn’t drowning in research, I was wracking my brain for a way to fix things between us. It all came back to what we’d talked about before. Rixon felt out of control. My going behind his back had only exacerbated the issue. He’d admitted to wanting time to work through his feelings. But why should he work through them alone?

I caught low murmurs in the hall outside. I’d left the door cracked so that I’d hear him coming. The voices fell silent and then the door opened⁠—

“What—oh my gods, Rixon!” I dropped the shackles clenched in my hand and rushed to him. “What happened?! Who did this?”

“Herrin. I’m fine.”

I blew out a relieved breath and fought a smile. “Looks like he got the better of you.”

“Something like that.” Rixon’s eyes darted over me then fell to the Nebrine shackles—the same shackles his father had used on me—laying on the floor. He took a step back and frowned. “What is this?”

“I…” Suddenly, everything I’d rehearsed slid right out of my mind. I’d been planning to tell him about all the thinking I’d done. How I’d gone back down to the royal cells and retrieved the shackles. How I wanted to fix things. None of that happened.

Limbs trembling, I retrieved the shackles. I held them out and said, “I submit.”

His lips parted. “Mina…” He looked seconds from fleeing.