Page 131 of Stalkers Anonymous

Of the two rules thus far, this is easily the hardest to agree to. It’s always been one of my biggest flaws. Overstepping and taking control.

“Okay,” I say, exhaling slowly. “I can do that.”

“Rule three is open communication. All the way through. Nobody runs solo. Nobody keeps secrets from the rest of the group. If someone is spiraling, everyone knows. If someone is having second thoughts, the group knows. If a target turns out to be more or less dangerous than we thought, the group knows. We move as a unit, or we don’t move at all.”

This goes against everything I’ve just spent the last seventy-two hours doing. My eyes find the red string and papers stuck to my walls. I have to give up control to help Hailey. This is what she wants. She said Lars Winters is hers, so I’m going to serve him to her on a silver platter. We’re going to serve him.

“Cole.” Jessica’s voice pulls me back to reality, gentler now. “You’ve been spiraling. We know. We’ve all known. We waited to see if you’d come to us first, and you didn’t, so we’re here. That’s how this works. That’s what rule three means in practice. Nobody on this team gets to disappear into their own head with a project. Not even when it’s the one that matters most.”

“Okay,” I mutter, surprised by the raw emotion pressing behind my eyes.

“We aren’t mad at you for what you’ve been doing. Most of us would have done the same thing in your shoes. We’ve all been there, done versions of it. We’re telling you that if you want to be part of this, you don’t do it alone anymore. You bring us in.”

I take a breath, and it comes out shaky. “Okay. Yeah. I hear you.”

“Can you live with it?”

I sit with it for a moment before I answer, riffling through all the thoughts in my head, which are settling into a semblance of order now that the spinning has slowed.

This is what Hailey would want. I could have endless resources at my fingertips, and all I have to do is say yes. She can have her revenge and then some, and we won’t be in it alone. We can put Lars Winters away forever.

In jail. In the ground. Doesn’t much matter to me, as long as he can’t ever get to my girl again.

I’m not entirely sure a blanket “yes” would be one hundred percent truthful, so I answer honestly instead. “I want to. I think I can, but I’m going to need help, especially when it comes to not running solo. That’s where I’ve been…broken, since before I met any of you.”

“That’s the right answer,” Tyler beams, clapping his hand on my shoulder. The entire group seems to exhale at once, like they’d all been holding their breath.

“It is?”

“If you’d answered an unconditional ‘yes,’ I would’ve been on my feet and out the door.”

“Alright,” Jessica says. “Glad to have you. Now—”

“There’s one more rule,” Tyler says, his tone switching from light-hearted to sober in the space of a blink.

“What’s that?” I meet his eyes, finding a mischievous twinkle.

“We only refer to ourselves as Stalkers Anonymous.”

Jessica stands up, laughing while she pulls her jacket off the back of the chair. “We’re meeting at my place tomorrow night at seven. Talk to Hailey about it, and bring her if she wants to come. If she doesn’t want to come, you call me and we figure out something else. The point is for her to run the meeting. Not us. Not you. Her.”

“Got it,” I smile, feeling genuinely appreciative. “I’ll talk to her.”

“And Cole?” Jessica stops on her way to the door.

“Yeah?”

She scans the wall behind me. “Take this down. All of it. Tonight. Before you bring her in.”

I turn to my murder map, then back to her. “Why?”

“Because she’s going to walk in here and see what you alone with your spiraling thoughts looks like, and she’s going to be scared. Trust my female perspective. She sees this? It’s over before it starts.”

“Yeah. Yeah, okay,” I wave her off. “I’ll take it down.”

“Don’t throw it away. Just take it off the walls. Bring it with you tomorrow.”

“Got it.” Inexplicably, I shoot finger guns in her direction. “Take it down and don’t scare Hailey away. Easy.”