Page 71 of Twisted Road

“You’re waiting for Keys?” Hannah led the way to a very small table close to another door that led to the back, most likely the supply room.

“Yes.” Lyric didn’t know what else to say. She sank into the chair and found it surprisingly comfortable. It was carved wood, highly polished, gleaming and rich looking. She was short and Hannah was tall, yet each of the chairs seemed to work for them.

“You seem troubled,” Hannah said. “I don’t mean to pry, but perhaps I have some capability to ease your worries.”

The low tone was sweet and inviting. There was no compulsion; Lyric would have recognized it. Instead, Hannah’s voice was sincere. She inspired trust in a way no one ever had. Lyric didn’t quite know what to do.

Hannah waved her hand, and a teapot instantly sang merrily. “I knew Jonas from the time we were children. I was so painfully shy, I couldn’t speak in front of anyone, even at school. When I did manage to speak, I stuttered. My sisters would help me, so no one knew, not even Jonas. He thought I was stuck-up, just like everyone else did, but I honestly couldn’t speak. As I grew up, I learned several languages and traveled the world, which I despised doing, but I still couldn’t speak without the help of my sisters. For years, I conformed, pretending to be someone I wasn’t. It was very, very difficult.”

She poured tea into two cups. “All that time, I loved Jonas. There was never going to be anyone else for me, but I knew it wouldn’t work between us. He was everything I wasn’t. Adventurous. Brave. Outgoing, so outgoing.” She sighed and raised the cup to her lips, looking at Lyric over it. “He was always involved in something crazy, military, working for special teams; I don’t even know everything he did, but I did know it was dangerous and he thrived on that life.”

Lyric’s churning stomach began to settle as some of the tension eased out of her. Hannah wasn’t requiring anything of her. She was very interested in Hannah’s story. The last thing she expected was a woman who had done things she’d read about, a supermodel, confessing to feeling the same as Lyric felt.

“I knew he would eventually want to go into something like he’s done, becoming the sheriff. People vote, and they want to know his family. I didn’t want to be seen, and that was before the attack. That woman walking the runway wasn’t me. She was never going to be me, but that was all anyone saw. Even my sisters believed in her and didn’t see me.”

Hannah could have been talking about Lyric. It had never occurred to her that she would end up identifying with a woman like Hannah. And a woman who obviously wielded so much power. How could she have felt small and unseen?

“I didn’t want anyone to know the real me.” Hannah continued her confession. “I knew they couldn’t accept me the way I was. I wanted to be a homemaker. Stay in my house and raise my children. I wanted to bake and cook and sew and make my lotions, elixirs, tonics and various homeopathic remedies that could help others if they were ill. I had no desire to travel, yet it was expected of me. Great things are expected of those in my family. Staying home wasn’t even on the table.”

Lyric didn’t want to interrupt her. Didn’t want to tell her about being cast aside for her differences, but Hannah seemed to know.

“At least I had a loving family, and believe me, they all love me. They all wanted to help me, but they didn’t understand me or even see the real me. I didn’t let them because I didn’t want to let them down.” She took another sip of tea. “Well, it was more than that. I didn’t think they could ever accept me as I am.”

“I definitely know that feeling,” Lyric murmured before she could stop herself.

Hannah nodded and gave her a small smile of camaraderie. “I knew that you did, the moment I saw you with Keys and the others. You’re me, all over again.” She placed her teacup carefully on the table.

“But you’re with Jonas. How did that happen?”

Hannah sighed. “Not easily. Before this happened to me”—she gestured toward her face—“he made it clear he wanted to be with me. I was so scared, but I made up my mind to take the chance with him. He was so adamant—and persuasive.” Faint color crept into her fair skin, turning the cream to rose. “But then I was attacked and I felt hideous. Not just my face, but all over my body. The last thing I wanted was for a man like Jonas to look at me. I loved him so much, and I knew I was never going to be the same. I had no self-esteem. No confidence at all in any aspect of my life. I wanted to curl up and stay hidden inside my house for the rest of my life. My sisters would speak in whispers and try to figure out what to do with ‘poor Hannah.’ Jonas had no problem picking the lock on my door and ordering me to get up.”

“That sounds like something Keys might do,” Lyric said.

“It wasn’t funny at the time, although now, looking back, it is. Mostly, I’m grateful that he didn’t give up on us. He’s so bossy, there are times when I want to kick him very hard, but it was that trait that saved me—saved us. He was that certain of us. No matter what I said or did, he countered it. He was always there. Always. I found I could totally rely on him, and I learned to trust that he would always look out for us, for me, even when I was petrified to do the things he asked of me.”

“Trust is hard,” Lyric said. “The kind of trust you’re talking about.”

Hannah nodded. “It is. It took me so long to believe he loved me and that he’d stay with me when everything I was had been taken from me. At least, I thought it was that way. He pointed out to me that I never wanted that life. He knew and always gave me such a bad time. He’d tell my family I didn’t want the life, but they would get angry with him. Instead of backing him up, I took the coward’s way out and let them be upset with him. He still didn’t give up on us. He kept working with me until I had to believe him.”

She sent Lyric a rueful smile. “Not that I still don’t have periods of doubt. I make his life miserable when that happens. I can’t say we don’t argue, because we do. Not the way other couples do, because I’m truly the difficult one and I know it. I’m always mindful of that. It isn’t easy to live with someone like me. I have too much anxiety, and it builds up until I feel I have no control whatsoever. Then I do crazy things to get control. Like sometimes I decide we can’t have caffeine or sugar, both things Jonas lives for.”

Hannah tipped her face up, looking at the ceiling for a moment. “We use humor a lot. He does things like bursting into my place of business and acting like he might shoot one of my clients because I’m showing him how to give his woman a massage. He likes to stir me up, and we end up laughing together when we’re alone. He’s never afraid to laugh at himself. Never. I love that about him. He has supreme confidence, and yet, you know, he never felt anyone could love him.”

Lyric couldn’t believe how closely Hannah’s life matched hers. Not that Lyric thought she was a beautiful, well-traveled supermodel, but the way they both had anxiety issues. The way it was their men who fought for the relationships and were so absolutely certain they were meant to be.

“Keys believes that as well. Or he did until I came along.”

“Like us, those insecurities will show themselves on and off for the rest of your lives. They don’t just go completely away, as I suspect you know. Everyone deals with issues that can prevent them from finding happiness. It’s important to know if you honestly see the other person for exactly who he is, not who you want him to be—or think you want him to be. I need Jonas’ strength. I honestly think you need Keys’ strength. We might be independent and strong, but crippling anxiety can reduce us to that woman hiding in her bed or running for the hills.”

“You knew I wanted to run away,” she said. “That’s my go-to. I’m a runner.”

Hannah gave her another gorgeous smile. “If you love him and you believe he really loves you, take the chance with him, Lyric. As long as you know, in your deepest being, that he loves you and will always look out for you first, do your best to try to trust him.”

Lyric pressed her lips together. She wanted the happy ever after, but it always seemed out of reach. Jonas was law enforcement. Keys was an assassin or something equally the opposite of Hannah’s husband.

“His lifestyle scares me.”

“Life scares you, just as it does me,” Hannah corrected. “But the point of life is living it. Do your best to know him, to make him happy, to see to his needs. Make absolutely certain he knows what you need. That requires communication.”