Page 11 of Frost and Venom

Raine sent her a small smile. “He isn’t my boss. I get very tired of all the people who think I should always act a certain way. I’m never allowed fun, to cut loose, to have too much to drink. I’m always supposed to keep myself and everyone around me under control. I get very tired of it. Mostly, after this happened to my leg, I realized I was wasting my life working all the time. If I don’t do the things I want to do now, I’ll never do them.”

Harlow nodded her understanding. Raine always did the right thing. Truthfully, she couldn’t imagine Raine straying too far from what everyone considered right.

“You did go your own way on your solitary backpacking trips,” Harlow pointed out cautiously. Raine had traveled the world, mostly on her own.

“Believe me, they tracked me everywhere I went. The General spent a great deal of time trying to get me to answer him when I made it very clear I was on vacation. You would have thought the world was coming to an end because I actually took time for myself.”

“You’ve always let them get away with pulling you in after you’ve said no to them,” Harlow speculated. “They got used to never taking no for an answer.”

“I did that to myself,” Raine said. “I made mistakes when I was very young, and it cost my father his life. I made up my mind I wouldn’t be so selfish ever again.”

“Raine, it isn’t selfish to take time for yourself when you work as much as you do. Sometimes one needs to just breathe in fresh air and be with friends or alone in order to recoup. Self-care is important for mental health.” Harlow tried not to sound like a nurse. What she said was very true, and if anyone needed a respite now and then, it was Raine. She was in a high-stress job and subject to seeing all kinds of reports with photographs that would give most people permanent nightmares.

“When I nearly lost this leg”—Raine dropped one hand to her thigh and rubbed as if the leg ached—“I realized time was very precious, and I had to make changes in my life. I guess I’m still sorting out how to do that. And even figuring out what I want to do.”

Harlow fell silent, clutching the door of the Jeep as they bumped along the old dirt track. They had taken the road to the hot springs, and a good seven miles past that was an unmarked trail leading to the property. The road was very flat, and with all the wildflowers and high grass, they could have turned onto a meadow. It was no longer marked, but Harlow had been out to the property several times.

“Vienna said the land is privately owned,” Harlow said. “A lot of acres, but the family never lived here. There’s no house; only an old barn. I’ve seen it several times, and it’s mostly falling down. One entire side has collapsed. Since no one ever comes out here, the land has reverted back to nature. Bears, mountain lions, bobcats and foxes seem to be here in abundance. And we can’t forget about rattlesnakes. There must be a den somewhere close, because they love the boulders for sunning.”

“It is the perfect environment,” Raine said. “Water in the creek close by, rodents, birds and ground squirrels, so plenty to eat. Rocks to sun themselves. No one around. I can see rattlesnakes thriving here.”

“That’s one thing to keep in mind when climbing. Watch where you’re putting your fingers,” Harlow cautioned.

“You know I will,” Raine assured.

“This is where Stella and Sam came to climb the boulders and realized Denver was the killer. There are two boulders here. They call them the Twin Devils. Both are high balls and take a tremendous amount of work. As far as I know, no one but me has been here trying the climb in months. Most people don’t even know about them.”

Raine shot her a sharp glance. “You’ve been coming out here alone to attempt a high ball? Did you let anyone know where you were going?”

Harlow didn’t answer. This place had been her refuge. She felt safe and at peace. She hadn’t wanted anyone to know where she was. Sometimes it felt good to disappear from the real world.

“It isn’t wise, and I think you know that. If you had an accident on the boulder, or a snake bit you, or any other number of things, no one would be able to help you.”

It wasn’t like she didn’t know that. It was just that with everything going on in her life, she needed to escape from reality. But Raine was right: she should have let someone know where she was.

That brought up the issues of personal freedom and accountability to friends and family.

“I guess I can’t say too much,” Raine said. “I’m being a hypocrite by scolding you for doing something dangerous on your own. I certainly wanted to be alone when I did my backpacking trips. I even got rid of my Garmin, hoping they couldn’t track me.”

“Isn’t it weird that we both have the same tendencies?” Harlow asked. “I honestly never noticed the similarities between us.”

Raine sent her a small smile. “I screwed up when I was a kid because I was young and naïve and trusted the wrong man. When that got my father killed and all my family turned their backs on me, I vowed I would always know what was going on, the truth, no matter how bad it was. What that’s done after witnessing betrayal the world over is to keep me from believing in anyone other than our very tight circle.”

“And I’m the same way,” Harlow admitted. “I know I’m incapable of a relationship because I have absolutely no faith in men. And yes, I know that’s not a good thing, but no matter what I’ve done to change it, I can’t see myself with anyone.”

“Neither can I,” Raine admitted.

The Jeep turned onto the much more overgrown road as they entered the property. At one time, there had been a cattle fence, but most of it was on the ground. Only an occasional broken pole, rotting due to the weather, was partially standing, and even those were effectively hidden by the tall, out-of-control grass.

The barn came into sight, roof sagging and walls buckling. From the angle they drove in, they could see that at least two walls were still intact. Possibly a third. In the early morning light, with the frost still on the ground, the wood glistened, appearing otherworldly.

Raine pulled the Jeep close to the dilapidated barn and turned off the motor. She took a deep breath and turned toward Harlow. “Wilder was sent out on a mission by Blom. He failed to check in, and they’ve been quietly trying to find him. Blom believes him to be deceased.”

Harlow sat very still. Raine was an analyst and a very good one at that. She put together pieces of puzzles no one else even connected.

“I figure he’s at your house, and Rainier’s protecting him, even from Blom. You know I won’t say a word, but it’s a relief to know he’s alive.”

Harlow pressed her lips together. “You’d have to ask Rainier what he’s doing at my house.”