Page 51 of Us Defiant Few

She kept twirling the tiny rock, not realizing she was shaking until Winnie placed a steady palm over hers, anchoring her in that dark moment.

“You deserved to be saved, too,” Winnie breathed, and Khalani’s brows pulled together.

“I don’t know what you—”

“You told Winnie that Doctor Strauss had tortured you first. It was Takeshi who rescued you. He set you free.”

The invisible pit inside her widened. She swallowed, trying not to unwind further.

Her gaze drifted over to where Takeshi sat in the shadows. So close and yet so far.

“Do you wish you were the one left behind?” Winnie whispered.

“How could I not?” she responded without thinking, the emotion surging forth like rocks tumbling down a hill. “He’s been through so much. Saved us so many times. It should’ve been me that stayed. It should’ve fucking been me.”

Khalani bit down on her lip, trying to contain the tears that were ready to return to the earth.

“Do you see those stars?” Winnie asked, and Khalani frowned at the abrupt change in subject, but she tilted her head, following her gaze to the deep black sky.

“Let’s find one that moves.” Winnie’s forehead knitted in concentration as she searched the vast space.

“They move?”

“The old scholars called them shooting stars. Great big giant rocks that fly—there!” Winnie enthusiastically pointed up. A bright white streak cut across the sky. Her mouth parted, and Winnie hummed in approval, shutting her eyes.

“There. Winnie did it.”

“Did what?”

“She made her wish.” Winnie gave a coy smile and squeezed her hand tighter. “Her wish is for you to see yourself as others do. Maybe then you’ll realize how necessary you truly are.”

Her chin trembled as Winnie held her tighter. Letting her know that even if Khalani didn’t truly believe the empty pieces of her mattered, the important part was that someone else did.

And maybe one day, when her life shuttered to a close, she’d overflow with her own self-worth.

“Can I…” She sniffled. “Can I make a wish too?”

“Of course. Let’s find another one.”

She stared up at the sky as her second mother held her. They waited for a while, the world silent with them, until they saw it. One tiny streak of hope soaring across the universe.

Winnie turned to her and whispered, “Keep this wish for yourself.”

Khalani nodded, thinking hard about what she wanted. For her family to be safe. For them all to make it to Apollo and return alive. But one face kept returning to her.

I wish for Takeshi to have it all. His memories. A life full of hope, love, and happiness that makes up for all the pain he’s suffered.

Even if it’s not with me.

14

What is the heart, if not a wasteland of love?

Khalani noticed that Takeshi kept to the back of the group as they traveled along the hopeless highway, weaving around the empty vehicles scattered about.

The sunlight reverently haloed his black hair and highlighted his dark eyes. Others collapsed under the weight of the vast unknown, but Takeshi thrived in it.

Khalani’s brows pulled together as she watched him stare at his hands with an odd fixation.