Page 102 of Play Nice

“No. I love a craft cocktail. I was just expecting beer and burgers.”

“You can get a beer,” Daffy says. “And they’re known for their burgers.”

Leda sighs, impatient.

“Leeds,” I say. “Let’s enjoy ourselves now. While we can. Before the talk.”

“I took the six a.m. Acela,” she says.

“Then let’s hope for all our sakes that the drinks are strong and the food is good,” I say, kicking her restless leg under the table.

“Ow!”

“Please,” Daphne says.

Our waiter arrives. Exquisite timing.

Everyone calms down after ordering drinks and starters—truffle fries and spicy shrimp. Then Daphne tells us about a date she went on earlier in the week with a pastry chef named Daisy.

“Daphne and Daisy,” I say. “I don’t see it going anywhere.”

“Stop,” Leda says. “I think it’s sweet. Do you like her?”

“I do,” Daphne says. “She has cats, though. She adopted them.”

“ ‘Them’? How many?” I ask.

“Two. Betty and Ophelia.”

“Two is too many,” I say, taking a sip of my twenty-dollar cocktail. It’s not strong enough. I flag down the waiter and order a different one.

“Don’t listen to Clio,” Leda says. “It’s good she has pets. Shows she’s compassionate and responsible. Tom grew up with dogs. He wants one now, but we’re too busy. Never home. Maybe down the road.”

“I’m fine with her having cats, but I’m allergic. Remember?”

“Like I said, I don’t see it going anywhere.” I reach for another fry as Leda scowls at me.

“You hate love,” she says, which makes both me and Daphne laugh.

“I don’t hate love,” I say. “Just seems like more trouble than it’s worth. It’s fun until it isn’t, and once the fun part’s over, why bother?”

“Companionship. Partnership,” Leda says. “Tax benefits.”

“How romantic!” I say, swooning.

“All right, all right,” Daphne says. She sips her cocktail, a mezcal Paloma.

“I have companionship when I want,” I say. “Austin.”

“Who’s that?” Daphne asks.

“The neighbor.”

“That’s still going on?”

“When I feel like it.”

“That’s not a relationship,” Leda says.