Page 78 of Kiss Slay Replay

There’s no time for this. I pull away. “Why did you say you wouldn’t? Wouldn’t what?”

“There’s something wrong with that deer,” he says, sipping from his flask. He offers it to me.

“No thanks. What’s wrong with it?”

“It’s hurt. I think that’s the…” He gestures around. “Aroma.”

First the ravens, now this? I’m like a cursed Disney Princess, a magnet for deranged wildlife. I have to worry about everything. What’s next? Bugs? The grass, the trees, the air? Fuck. How did I think I could do anything to stand in the way of the horror? “Hurt how?”

He furrows his brow.

“I’m, um, a vet.”

“Ah. Don’t think there’s any saving it. Its side is ripped open. Must have been attacked. Bear. Fox? I don’t know. It’s rough, but. You’re off duty.” He does his awkward laugh, winning me over for a moment, my vision going rosy. “We’re at a wedding.”

“We are. Well, I am. You’re drinking out of a flask in the woods.”

“Needed a minute to myself,” he says. “I get so anxious at shit like this.”

“I know. Formal, stand here, smile for photos, sit-down dinner, speeches, that weird mix of family and strangers,” I say, turning back toward the woods. The deer is gone, but something tells me this isn’t the last of it. “Maybe tonight will surprise you.”

“Oh yeah?”

I look up at him, and he’s looking back at me with that crooked grin, and even though I know that whatever’s between us is most likely a rickety bridge over a bottomless pit of nothing, I want to believe that there’s something more here than just fleeting chemistry. I can’t help it. I want to assign it meaning, to hold on to something in this whirlwind of loss and pain and chaos and confusion. I want this to last beyond tonight, for him to prove to me that there is a tomorrow. I want him, someone, anyone to show me that it’s possible to open your heart without it ending up a complete fucking massacre.

The pianist comes in with her jaunty tune—queen of ruining the moment.

Danny takes another swig from his flask then tucks it away.

“On behalf of Stephanie and Jason,” the pianist says, “we welcome you to this celebration of their love. If you would please make your way to the lake and find a seat, the ceremony will begin shortly. Thank you.”

Danny offers me his arm, and I take it.

—

We’re the stragglers, last to arrive at the ceremony space. Luke waves me over, pointing to a saved seat between Cassie and Evan.

“Come find me later,” Danny says. “Okay?”

“We’ll see. If you’re lucky.” If we’re lucky. If there is a later. I slink away, mumble excuse me repeatedly as I squeeze down the row of chairs, trying to avoid people’s knees.

Cass pulls me down into the empty chair. “What is with you today? You’re late. Again.”

“Sorry. I’m sorry. I’m here.”

She sighs.

“Who were you with?” Evan asks, in a lazy attempt at a whisper. “Who is that?”

I get my phone out and open the Notes app, start typing. Danny. Jason’s childhood friend. PS u suck at whispering.

“Ew,” he says.

I type, ???

He takes my phone, rolls his shoulders back, then types out his response. Spent the weekend with him and Jace a few years back he had a shaved head and gross tech bro beard then he’s INSUFFERABLE!!! bragged about money women taking a model on a trip to Paris then ignoring her calls after went on and on about ethical nonmonogamy being the only sane form of monogamy meanwhile both Jace & I are in committed relationships.

The musical duo starts to play “Here, There and Everywhere” as Jace walks down the aisle.