Page 119 of Lucky Haven

His breath catches as he hears my double meaning. “Not tonight. I’ll be too rough.”

“Will you? Or is that something else you tell yourself because it’s easier to believe than that you’re perfect?”

“Not fucking perfect.”

“You’re perfect for me.”

“Fucking hell, Haven, you’re so sweet, you make me feral.”

I like that so much. “Feral?”

“I ache to be inside you. To feel, from the inside out, that you’re still vibrant and safe and mine. To feel your…”

“My what?” I cradle his face between my breasts, loving the feel of his lips on my skin as he answers me. I can’t get enough naked contact with him. Feral is a good word for how I feel, too.

He moans against me. “Your pulse.” he kisses me at the base of my neck. “It’s not enough to feel it here…” He drags his face back to my breasts. “Or to hear it here.”

“That’s not enough? You need to be inside me?”

“Don’t talk dirty to me, not when I’m trying to do the right thing.”

“I don’t mean to.”

“That’s what makes it so good. So right. So filthy. You’re so fucking sweet.” He steps back. His chest heaves with a deep breath as he pins wild eyes on me. “Shower first. Then bed.”

Yes, shower first.

I need him to make me clean.

And then I need him to make me whole, and that will happen in bed.

Chapter Forty-Three

Cash

In the shower, Haven melts against me. The ferocity of my desire to take care of her and make things right rocks me to my core.

It’s not enough to know she’s forgiven me, that she loves me and knows I love her. It’s not enough to be just enough. I need to eradicate all doubt in her mind. I will never again leave her wondering if she’s carrying more of the emotional weight between us.

Which means revealing parts of myself I’ve spent more than a decade, my entire adult life, suppressing.

“I’ve always needed more time with my thoughts than my brothers,” I tell her as I sluice soapy bubbles down her back. “There might be times in the future where I’m not quick enough to tell you something important.”

“I’ll have to watch you carefully, then, because you’ll show me in your actions.” Haven twists in my arms.

My gaze drops to the delicate gold chain around her neck, the crucifix Jeb ignored as he dragged a knife against her jaw.

I should have smashed his face against the door frame one extra time as I dragged him from that cabin, the fucker.

Her eyes search my face. “What are you thinking?”

“Dark thoughts,” I say gruffly.

“Will you tell me them in time?”

“Not tonight.” I swallow hard and kiss her forehead, pulling her tight against my body. Nothing between us. Close enough I can feel her heart beating against me, and be grateful she’s alive and in my arms.

“That’s okay.” She nuzzles her face into my chest. “I like that you take time to sort out your thoughts and feelings. You have to find the right words. But when you do share with me, I trust that they’ll be the best words. You’ve always said the sweetest things to me.”