Page 9 of White Raven

“Skål! Skål! Skål!” The crowd chanted.

“Think that’s my cue,” Brynden muttered close to my ear, swinging my head to my left. I had forgotten he was next to me.

He grinned, tearing off a huge chunk of rabbit, reclining into me. “In your honor. The first bite for my wife.” He held up the oily meat between his fingers.

I should’ve drunk more.

The smile I was so used to faking pinned my face and I leaned toward him. He placed the rabbit on my tongue. I barely let myself chew before swallowing it down, trying not to picture its family wondering why their loved one did not return home.

Even growing up, I wanted animals as pets, not as dinner. I ate it because it was necessary, and I understood it was the way of our people, our main sustenance, but it still made me squeamish. I think I was the only person here who would choose potatoes over a hearty plate of meat.

The drinking and cheers doubled in the hall by the time he lifted a slice of ham to my lips, my stomach so full I wanted to refuse, but I knew I couldn’t. “In honor of my wife. She will have the last bite of my food as she had my first.” He fed me the last bite of our meal. The symbolism that he would make sure I was protected, safe, and secure for the rest of my days.

Suddenly those days felt endlessly strung out in front of me.

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” The revelers bashed cups together in thunderous booms.

Brynden beamed a toothy grin, rotating to me with a shrug. He leaned over, pecking mine softly, the room veering their ruckus into applause and whistles. He pulled away, joining the crowd in their jubilation.

Was that it?

My skin itched, and a tightness pulsed between my thighs, needing release. Needing more than a peck on my lips.

My mind full of alcohol, I boldly watched my future husband. Like a bird who couldn’t settle, his happy blue eyes were constantly darting around and laughing as if everything distracted him, effortlessly amused by it all. Simple. Easy to please. I couldn’t imagine him getting into a passionate fight. Grabbing and kissing me without provocation, desperate to tear my clothes off and be inside me.

Would he be a good lover?

This was the man I would spend my life with, would sleep beside every night, most likely have children with.

From my seat, I could see Sarina joining in the merriment, snuggled between two men, flirting outrageously with both. My father hated when Sarina acted like this, telling her a handmaiden should represent her mistress. But he never did anything more than scold her or have Elvina do it, which by no means changed her behavior for a moment.

Sarina nestled against one of the men, her hand disappearing under the table in his lap. His head went back, the people next to them too drunk to notice her getting him off right there. She was so free to act, to do whatever she wanted.

“Maybe tonight you can get a good taste of what your marriage bed will be like.” Sarina’s voice came into my head, turning me back to Brynden. We were engaged. No one would care if we were intimate before the actual wedding.

Raking my gaze over the room, I could see everyone was distracted: dancing, drinking, and involved in their own seductions. The king was in full conversation with Miika, yet his gaze was locked on Sarina, his lips twisted in a frown. The rest of the Blaxhall family was out dancing or too drunk to notice much.

Boldness took over.

“Follow me.” I took Brynden’s hand, getting up from the table.

“What?” His eyes widened in wonder. “Where are we going?”

A slow smile curled my lips.

“Come find out.”

Thankfully he wasn’t obtuse enough to not understand my meaning. Loping up, he stumbled behind me like a tipsy goat, banging and falling into tables and walls.

“Hurry!” I pulled him along with a laugh, feeling giddy and free for once. I no longer had to sneak into a barn to meet a lover.

Brynden grinned drunkenly at me as I dragged us out of the dining hall to the corridor. Thralls and other couples dotted the windowless passage, pushing me to go farther away from prying eyes.

“Hey, come here.” He yanked me back into him, his hand fumbling into my hair. His mouth met mine in a messy kiss. “I wanted to do that all night. You are so beautiful.” He slurred with a slight giggle. “So, so beautiful. I cannot believe I am marrying the White Raven!”

His giggle annoyed me, his words irritated me, his innocence bored me, and the way he kissed was doing nothing for me, but I shoved aside my thoughts, desperate for what I was craving, a restlessness in me I needed to cure.

“In here.” I opened the closest door, towing him with me into the familiar room, the evening sunlight glowing through the windows.